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In some countries, many more people are choosing to live alone nowadays than in the past. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

In some countries, many more people are choosing to live alone nowadays than in the past. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? dGnX
It is considered that nowadays people like to live alone as compare to the past. In my perception, this is a negative trend going on in some of the countries. The primary reason is that the people move from their home towns and left their families behind in order to find the jobs in other places where they started living so that they can earn their livelihood. It’s specifically very difficult for many to keep their family with them in other cities because the expenses are very high, therefore they are not able to cater their families in the cities. It is also increasing due to lack of patience and adjustability within people which makes them difficult to live with another person in the same room. As everyone has their own style of living because of which people feel inconvenience. However, living alone only increases the isolation because the individual is not able to share his happiness and sorrow with anyone due to which he becomes less social in the society which leads to depression and stress. This drives person to take extreme steps which distorted his all life. For instance: In Japan, people are busy with particularly their work therefore, they are not able to give proper time to their families because of which they feel depressed which leads to ineffectiveness and inefficiency at their work. In conclusion, People are living alone due to their jobs or they feel inconvenience to with others particularly. However, it makes person less socialize, hence people feel isolation and get stressed.
It
is considered
that nowadays
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
like to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
alone as compare to the past. In my perception, this is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
trend going on in
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
countries.

The primary reason is that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
from their home towns and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
behind in order to find the jobs in other places where they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they can earn their livelihood. It’s
specifically
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
difficult for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
with them in other cities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the expenses are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
high,
therefore
they are not able to cater their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
in the cities. It is
also
increasing due to lack of patience and adjustability within
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
them difficult to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
with another person in the same room.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
everyone has their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
style of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feel
inconvenience.

However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
alone
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
increases the isolation
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the individual is not able to share his happiness and sorrow with anyone due to which he becomes less social in the society which leads to depression and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
. This drives person to take extreme steps which distorted his all life.
For instance
: In Japan,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are busy with
particularly
their work
therefore
, they are not able to give proper time to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of which they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feel
depressed which leads to ineffectiveness and inefficiency at their work.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
alone due to their
Use a comma before 'or' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
jobs or
they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feel
inconvenience to with others
particularly
.
However
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
person less socialize,
hence
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feel
isolation and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stressed
.
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IELTS essay In some countries, many more people are choosing to live alone nowadays than in the past. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
258 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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