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In some countries, an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is, therefore, necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food.

In some countries, an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is, therefore, necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. jRPJy
It is clear to see that we live in an age when many of us are consuming too much fast foods and for this reason many people are becoming poisoned. Meanwhile it is important to government to inflict a higher tax on health damaging foods. This essay agrees with the statement that government should increase the price of the fast foods. There are several reasons why I agree to increasing price of the fast-foods. In the first place it would be extremely positive to reduce buying a lot of fast- foods, alcohol and tobaccos. For example, I remember having a party at a dance club with my friends and after having finished the music we wanted to drink beer but it was so much expensive therefore we could not buy the beer. If we bought to beer it would have been possibly affected to our health. Finally, there enough evidence that expensive products and foods play an important role in our lives in some cases, and this could lead to people not to buy expensive and unnecessary things.
It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in an age when
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of us are consuming too much
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
and
for this reason
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are becoming poisoned.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Meanwhile
it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
to inflict a higher tax on health damaging
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
. This essay
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agrees
with the statement that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should increase the price of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
foods.

There are several reasons why I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
to increasing price of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
-foods.

In the
first
place it would be
extremely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
buying
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
-
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
, alcohol and tobaccos.
For example
, I remember having a party at a dance club with my friends and after having finished the music we wanted to drink beer
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
much expensive
therefore
we could not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
the beer.
“If” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
If
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
to beer it would have been
possibly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
to our health.
Finally
, there
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
evidence that expensive products and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
play an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cases, and this could lead to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
not to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
expensive and unnecessary things.
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IELTS essay In some countries, an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is, therefore, necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food.

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
178 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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