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In recent years, the rapidly increasing population in many regions of the world raises the level of the sustained pressure on healthcare budgets for governments. Having an argument that citizens should be responsible for their health cost rather than relying on publicly free healthcare provision. From my perspective, I believe that this idea is not a viable solution which does not have positive effects for society as well as the government.

In recent years, the rapidly increasing population in many regions of the world raises the level of the sustained pressure on healthcare budgets for governments. Having an argument that citizens should be responsible for their health cost rather than relying on publicly free healthcare provision. From my perspective, I believe that this idea is not a viable solution which does not have positive effects for society as well as the government. GLk2g
In recent years, the rapidly increasing population in many regions of the world raises the level of the sustained pressure on healthcare budgets for governments. Having an argument that citizens should be responsible for their health cost rather than relying on publicly free healthcare provision. From my perspective, I believe that this idea is not a viable solution which does not have positive effects for society as well as the government. First of all, letting the population pay for their health costs is not a justifiable idea. Obviously, this idea, in the eyes of society, is immoral especially for the poorer elements of the community who can not afford the price of private services which could contribute to the frightening living cost. Also, according to many surveys, the majority of citizens rely on universal free healthcare because it is free and easy to approach. That entitles them to obtain the equally fundamental benefits of health insurance. Another point to consider is that reducing spending on the field of medicine would not change the financial picture as much as expected in many countries. By this I mean, the remaining budget for health insurance, although requiring a huge amount of money, is only one of numerous national investments, therefore cutting it could not solve the true issue. In conclusion, personally, I believe that it is essential for governments to keep funding for publicly free health care rather than let their citizens pay for their own cost. To increase the efficiency of this humanist policy, It need be supported and sponsored more from private investments.
In recent years, the
rapidly
increasing population in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
regions of the world raises the level of the sustained pressure on healthcare budgets for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
. Having an argument that citizens should be responsible for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
rather
than relying on
publicly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
healthcare provision. From my perspective, I believe that this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
is not a viable solution which does not have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effects for society
as well
as the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, letting the population pay for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
costs
is not a justifiable
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
.
Obviously
, this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
, in the eyes of society, is immoral
especially
for the poorer elements of the community who can not afford the price of private services which could contribute to the frightening living
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
.
Also
, according to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
surveys, the majority of citizens rely on universal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
healthcare
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
and easy to approach. That entitles them to obtain the
equally
fundamental benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
insurance.

Another point to consider is that reducing spending on the field of medicine would not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
the financial picture as much as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries. By this I mean, the remaining budget for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
insurance, although requiring a huge amount of money, is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
one of numerous national investments,
therefore
cutting it could not solve the true issue.

In conclusion
,
personally
, I believe that it is essential for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
funding for
publicly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
care
rather
than
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
their citizens pay for their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
. To increase the efficiency of this humanist policy, It
Did you mean "needs"?
need
be supported
and sponsored more from private investments.

IELTS essay In recent years, the rapidly increasing population in many regions of the world raises the level of the sustained pressure on healthcare budgets for governments. Having an argument that citizens should be responsible for their health cost rather than relying on publicly free healthcare provision. From my perspective, I believe that this idea is not a viable solution which does not have positive effects for society as well as the government.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
262 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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  • In recent years, the rapidly increasing population in many regions of the world raises the level of the sustained pressure on healthcare budgets for governments. Having an argument that citizens should be responsible for their health cost rather than relying on publicly free healthcare provision. From my perspective, I believe that this idea is not a viable solution which does not have positive effects for society as well as the government.