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In recent weeks, what business issue or news topic have you found inspiring?

In recent weeks, what business issue or news topic have you found inspiring? YwraV
A recent article from The New York Times reports that September saw the largest number on record of workers quitting their jobs in the United States, despite the over ten million job openings during the same period. While it would be simple to point to the pandemic and the economic havoc that it wreaked across the country as the culprit, the pandemic was but the proximate cause of this mass exodus, and the root causes, having been bubbling for decades, are far more complex. Although it would be inaccurate to portray all employers as nefarious entities seeking to exploit their employees, it is true that the increasingly competitive job market has meant that candidates would often have to sacrifice more of their own needs or values to find gainful employment. Now, the massive labor shortage has given workers significant leverage when it comes to negotiations over salaries and other perquisites, including parental leave. As a business student myself, I am under no delusion that financial solvency is unimportant. However, I believe that business, at its core, is about service. A healthier society with a rich array of services to enhance people’s daily lives raises the standard of living for everyone - employees and employers alike. The immense labor shortage in the interim is a thorny predicament, and I certainly hope that the numbers of job seekers and job vacancies can be reconciled in the post-pandemic world. However, as challenging as they are, the current differences between employee needs and employer wants are merely growing pains in the American economy. If workers’ current departure from the labor market is adumbrative of a recalibration of the balance of power between employers and employees in the future, then I feel optimistic that these temporary difficulties will lead to a more just and equitable world.
A recent article from The New York Times reports that September
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
the largest number on record of workers quitting their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
in the United States, despite the over ten million
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
openings during the same period. While it would be simple to point to the pandemic and the economic havoc that it wreaked across the country as the culprit, the pandemic was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the proximate cause of this mass exodus, and the root causes, having been bubbling for decades, are far more complex.

Although it would be inaccurate to portray all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employers
as nefarious entities seeking to exploit their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
, it is true that the
increasingly
competitive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
market has meant that candidates would
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
sacrifice more of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
needs or values to find gainful employment.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
, the massive labor shortage has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
workers significant leverage when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to negotiations over salaries and other perquisites, including parental
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
.

As a business student myself, I am under no delusion that financial solvency is unimportant.
However
, I believe that business, at its core, is about service. A healthier society with a rich array of services to enhance
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
’s daily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
raises the standard of living for everyone
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
-
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employers
alike.

The immense labor shortage in the interim is a thorny predicament, and I
certainly
hope that the numbers of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
seekers and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
vacancies can
be reconciled
in the post-pandemic world.
However
, as challenging as they are, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
differences between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
needs and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employer
wants are
merely
growing pains in the American economy. If workers’
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
departure from the labor market is
Possible spelling mistake found.
adumbrative
of a recalibration of the balance of power between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employers
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
in the future, then I feel optimistic that these temporary difficulties will lead to a more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
and equitable world.
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IELTS essay In recent weeks, what business issue or news topic have you found inspiring?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
301 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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