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In many countries the law saya that all young people must attend school or college untill 18 years age. Do you think advantages of their individuals and families outweigh disadvantages?

In many countries the law saya that all young people must attend school or college untill 18 years age. Do you think advantages of their individuals and families outweigh disadvantages? 70Wxn
In the world, number of nations have revealed the regulation that all youth generation should be completed school work or college untill turn on 18 age. If questioned, my perspective those are the drawbacks for them and family surpass the benefits. On the one hand, the foremost negative impact is in present time students must not be received sufficient course which is not to get a job or work because they have only completed basic school work, it is unnecessary. So that, they and their family member may be concerned about their career. For example, if young people only get 12 standard which is not any experience and knowledge in particular field. As a result, they have become unemployment which is not good for them and family. Furthermore, approximately, youth have attended academic task and after that they may be established own company and started business but 18 years old younger have not any skills and not a expert in that field. Therefore, might be they can loss it and also investment worse. As a consequence, family members and they have lossed property and so on. On the other hand, how to beneficial to finished their college untill 18 years age. Some pupils have been intelligent since they born. They can early gain college degree and after that they have received high salary job which is support their family through financial. For instance, if younger can do study along with experience according their interested which are pupil after finished school or university work, then do business. Few years later they have businessman. To conclude, in my preference, all young people must be completed their academic task and after then they have well-known that what is appropriate in future do work or further study. Because which is choose your and family career.
In the world, number of nations have revealed the regulation that all youth generation should
be completed
school
work
or college
untill
turn on 18 age. If questioned, my perspective those are the drawbacks for them and
family
surpass the benefits.

On the one hand, the foremost
negative
impact is in present time students
must
not
be received
sufficient course which is not to
get
a job or
work
because
they have
only
completed basic school
work
, it is unnecessary.
So
that, they and their
family
member may
be concerned
about their career.
For example
, if young
people
only
get
12 standard which is not any experience and knowledge
in particular
field.
As a result
, they have become unemployment which is not
good
for them and family.

Furthermore
, approximately, youth have attended academic task and after that they may
be established
own
company
and
started
business
but
18 years
old
younger have not any
skills
and not
a
expert in that field.
Therefore
, might be they can
loss
it and
also
investment worse. As a consequence,
family
members and
they have
lossed
property and
so
on.

On the other hand
, how
to beneficial to
finished their college
untill
18 years age.
Some
pupils have been intelligent since they born. They can early gain college degree and after that they have received high salary job which is support their
family
through financial.
For instance
, if younger can do study along with experience according their interested which are pupil after finished school or university
work
, then do business. Few years later they have businessman.

To conclude
, in my preference, all young
people
must
be completed
their academic task and after then they have well-known that what is appropriate in future do
work
or
further
study.
Because
which is
choose
your and
family
career.
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IELTS essay In many countries the law saya that all young people must attend school or college untill 18 years age. Do you think advantages of their individuals and families outweigh disadvantages?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
301 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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