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In a number of countries, some people thinks it’s necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

In a number of countries, some people thinks it’s necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. 9A80
In some parts of the world, there are some doubts about the way that we spend money in different transportation ways. Many people prefer spending it on making new railway lines, which linked between different cities, for trains that are so fast. Otherwise, another group of individuals wants the presented public transport to be improved. This essay will juxtapose both views and will finally end with my opinion which is why I prefer improving existing ones. On the one hand, building new lines for fast trains is so advantageous for the country. One of the positive implications of it, for example, is saving time for many citizens who need to move to another place for a specific purpose whether it is serious such as for momentous meeting or interview or for just entertaining and visit new places to know. As a result, it becomes easier for them to travel if they don’t have plenty of time due to their work. For instance, if someone wants to get relax time and leave the worries of the world behind but he spends a lot of time in his company, just have 4 hours a day free to him, so, with fast trains, he can do it and travel. But this process has some consequences, such as spending much money on it. It is not a cost-effective plan. On the other hand, others prefer investing in the already existing public transportation system, like cars and buses. They use it daily, much more than trains. When they go to work, visit friends or even go to your favorite place. Despite the huge developments that are occurred to these transport elements to be more environmentally friendly, there are a lot of vehicles which still release exhausts into the surroundings. For instance, the old cars that burn gases and have exploited parts in its body, they have the priority to be fixed. All in all, to a certain extent, I agree that fast trains are very important to be constructed, but I favor to fix and ameliorate what we have first. We can’t make a new change before fixing the old ones.
In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
parts of the world, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
doubts about the way that we spend money in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
transportation ways.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
prefer spending it on making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
railway lines, which linked between
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
cities, for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
that are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
.
Otherwise
, another group of individuals wants the presented public transport to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
. This essay will juxtapose both views and will
finally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
with my opinion which is why I prefer improving existing ones.

On the one hand, building
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
lines for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
advantageous for the country. One of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
implications of it,
for example
, is saving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
citizens who need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
to another place for a specific purpose whether it is serious such as for momentous meeting or interview or for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
entertaining and visit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
places to know.
As a result
, it becomes easier for them to travel if they don’t have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
due to their work.
For instance
, if someone wants to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
relax
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
the worries of the world behind
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
he spends
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
in his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
have 4 hours a day free to him,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
, he can do it and travel.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
this process has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
consequences, such as spending much money on it. It is not a cost-effective plan.

On the other hand
, others prefer investing in the already existing public transportation system, like cars and buses. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
it daily, much more than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
. When they go to work, visit friends or even go to your favorite place. Despite the huge developments that
are occurred
to these transport elements to be more
environmentally
friendly, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
vehicles which
still
release exhausts into the surroundings.
For instance
, the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
cars that burn gases and have exploited parts in its body, they have the priority to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
.

All in all, to a certain extent, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to
be constructed
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I favor to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fix
and ameliorate what we have
first
. We can’t
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
fixing the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
ones.
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IELTS essay In a number of countries, some people thinks it’s necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
356 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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