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In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sum of money on constructing new railway lines for the very fast trains between cities. others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both theses views and give your own opinion.

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sum of money on constructing new railway lines for the very fast trains between cities. others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. 5VKB
There is a colossal argument among the people with regard to the development of transport system in the city. Many people suggest that instead of building a new railways track, it is much better to spend same amount of money on enhancing the quality of old transport system. While, other have an opinion that in a competitive world providing a facility of bullet train will aid to the commuters to reach destination quickly. In this essay will discuss both the view points and my opinion will be outlined in conclusion. To begin with, in a modern era, reaching on desired location is one of the top most priority in any part of the world. For example, timely reporting to the office is the utmost criteria to calculate the performance of any employee. Under such circumstance, to commute the long distance between the cities it vital to have faster and convenient travelling facility which is implausible with the existing transport system which halt at multiple times at different locations. Therefore, constructing a new railway lines for faster trains yield the opportunity to the citizens to cover long routes rapidly without any interruptions. However, building the new railway tracks not only required massive budget but it also takes a very long time for its construction which create the inconvenience for the people. Hence, rather than introducing new train in the cities it is better to revamp the old transport system which make transportation more convenient and faster for daily commuting. For instance, by adding more buses in the busy route can provide instant services reducing the need of stoping at multiple locations. To conclude, with the innovation of latest technology, the world is progressing very rapidly nowadays. Therefore, i believe that it imperative to opt new transportation facilities to make travelling more faster rather than maintaining the old transport system.
There is a colossal argument among the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
with regard to the development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
in the city.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
suggest that
instead
of building a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "railway"?
railways
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
track
, it is much better to spend same amount of money on enhancing the quality of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
, other have an opinion that in a competitive world providing a facility of bullet train will aid to the commuters to reach destination
quickly
. In this essay will discuss both the view points and my opinion will
be outlined
in conclusion
.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, in a modern era, reaching on desired location is one of the top most priority in any part of the world.
For example
, timely reporting to the office is the utmost criteria to calculate the performance of any employee. Under such circumstance, to commute the long distance between the cities
Did you mean "is" or "it is"?
it
vital to have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
faster
and convenient travelling facility which is implausible with the existing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
which halt at multiple times at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
locations.
Therefore
, constructing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
railway lines for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
faster
trains yield the opportunity to the citizens to cover long routes
rapidly
without any interruptions.

However
, building the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
railway
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tracks
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
required massive budget
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it
also
takes a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
long time for its construction which create the inconvenience for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
Hence
,
rather
than introducing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
train in the cities it is better to revamp the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
transportation more convenient and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
faster
for daily commuting.
For instance
, by adding more buses in the busy route can provide instant services reducing the need of
Possible spelling mistake found.
stoping
at multiple locations.

To conclude
, with the innovation of
A determiner is probably missing here: "the latest".
latest
technology, the world is progressing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
rapidly
nowadays.
Therefore
,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
believe that
Did you mean "is" or "it is"?
it
imperative to opt
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
transportation facilities to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
travelling more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
faster
rather
than maintaining the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
.
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IELTS essay In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sum of money on constructing new railway lines for the very fast trains between cities. others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
308 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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