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Impoving the quality of life is a better crime prevention than strenghtning punishments

Impoving the quality of life is a better crime prevention than strenghtning punishments 7LK52
Nowadays we are witnessing a host of actions which are aimed at reducing crimes. One of them is the improvement of life and conditions for it within a society. This crime prevention is considered to be better than punishment and I strongly disagree with that. This essay will explain my point of view. First of all, we cannot our living conditions, make society a better place, therefore, reduce crimes. There still will be people who will find something that they will be disappointed with. Someone will have somehing better than another person, and people will start envying and then commit crimes. Second of all, in my opinion, the nature of people is that sooner or later they will begin to destroy everything around them. It means that, unfortunately, wounderful life in sociey will not hold people back for a long time. They will start using everything good, destroying it, which will also lead to riots and crimes. In conclusion, I can say that this way of crime prevention is not good enough. People have to completely understand that there will be serious consequences for their actions. Only in this case, when people understand that there are penalties for them, the level of crimes can be reduced.
Nowadays we are witnessing a host of actions which
are aimed
at reducing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
. One of them is the improvement of life and conditions for it within a society. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
prevention
is considered
to be better than punishment and I
strongly
disagree with that. This essay will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
my point of view.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, we cannot our living conditions,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
society a better place,
therefore
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
. There
still
will be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who will find something that they will
be disappointed
with. Someone will have
Possible spelling mistake found.
somehing
better than another person, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
envying and then commit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
. Second of all, in my opinion, the nature of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
is that sooner or later they will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroy
everything around them. It means that, unfortunately,
Possible spelling mistake found.
wounderful
life in
Possible spelling mistake found.
sociey
will not hold
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
back for a long time. They will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
using everything
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
, destroying it, which will
also
lead to riots and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
.
In conclusion
, I can say that this way of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
prevention is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
completely understand that there will be serious consequences for their actions.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Only
in this case
, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
understand that there are penalties for them, the level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
.
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IELTS essay Impoving the quality of life is a better crime prevention than strenghtning punishments

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
206 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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