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Importance of technology in getting people out of their misery

Importance of technology in getting people out of their misery rGVb6
In the last decades, technology took a magnificent role in peoples life. It even had many impacts on the way people used to communicate. It affected our lives in many ways some are positive, others are negative. There are many advantages that are offered by technology. It helps in enhancing peoples bond, for example if long distance relations are easier these days due to technology, and internet thus people now have a video call, for instance however before technology people used to communicate with the help of birds. Before technology, it used to take for like 4 5 months to just send a message to a family member for instance, moreover with the advancement of technology after the introductions of smart phones, voice quality, pictures, video calls all improved. On the same side, technology helped people in diagnosing, self treatment, and self-knowledge about any idea that may pop into your mind. On the inverse trend, every advantage will be faced with downwards. Children now are so obsessed with cell phones, TikTok, YouTube, which in turn will negatively impact their personality, school grades, will even limit their mental, and learning abilities. As well as, improper use of technology may waste people time on meaningless issues, thus negatively affecting the economy. Moreover, games may irritate children in some ways where a child might hurt himself, or others living in the same community, they may turn to be highly aggressive thus putting young aged-population at many risks. Proper use of technology will help in raising many people, giving them every advantage of success, however improper usage may lead to many crises. I aver that, technology has many positive impacts. People must use it in a positive way, and get each, and gain each, and every benefit it offers.
In the last decades,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
took a magnificent role in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
peoples
life. It even had
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
impacts on the
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way
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to communicate. It
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
, others are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
.

There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
advantages that
are offered
by
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technology
. It
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
in enhancing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
peoples
bond,
for example
if long distance relations are easier these days due to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
, and internet
thus
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
have a video call,
for instance
however
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to communicate with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of birds.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Before
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to take for like 4 5 months to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
a message to a family member
for instance
,
moreover
with the advancement of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
after the introductions of smart phones, voice quality, pictures, video calls all
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
. On the same side,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in diagnosing, self treatment, and self-knowledge about any
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that may pop into your mind.

On the inverse trend, every advantage will
be faced
with downwards. Children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
obsessed with cell phones, TikTok, YouTube, which in turn will
negatively
impact their personality, school grades, will even limit their mental, and learning abilities.
As well
as, improper
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
may waste
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
time on meaningless issues,
thus
negatively
affecting the economy.
Moreover
, games may irritate children in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
where a child might hurt himself, or others living in the same community, they may turn to be
highly
aggressive
thus
putting young aged-population at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risks
.

Proper
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in raising
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, giving them every advantage of success,
however
improper usage may lead to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
crises. I aver that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
impacts.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
it in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
way
, and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
each, and gain each, and every benefit it offers.
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IELTS essay Importance of technology in getting people out of their misery

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
295 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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