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Impact of ageing population

Impact of ageing population rYxb2
Nowadays, it is not surprising that people in the industrialized nations want to live longer than ever. That has caused dramatic debates among people due to its impact on the entire society. Therefore, in the upcoming paragraph, I will explore significant effects and take steps to mitigate the problems. As people live longer and the population of the developed countries grow older, several problems can be foreseen. The main issue is certainly more people in the old age who have to receive a pension. The portion of working adults and younger is smaller, that means the government will receive less money in taxes. Moreover, most elderly in this age (55-60) tend to be healthy enough to continue their jobs. Therefore, the authorities should change the policy about the retirement age of employees and raise the pension age to 60 or even 65 depending on the health of the individual. In addition, a further crisis at the cost of retirement age is an increase of the burden on adolescents due to the fact that they have to pay taxes for themselves and to support the elderly. That means adults takes most of the time and energy to look after their elderly relatives. Therefore, an approach to solve this problem may involve the government establishing some laws to encourage the households to give more births. That helps to replace the ageing population in the future and refreshing the population structure. In conclusion, the world has developed rapidly in recent years and it has positive impacts on the average life expectancy. However, the pension issue and increasing number of elderly are weighing down on the economy to solve these problems, the government should adjust the retirement age and promoting families to give more births.
Nowadays, it is not surprising that
people
in the industrialized nations want to
live
longer than ever. That has caused dramatic debates among
people
due to its impact on the entire society.
Therefore
, in the upcoming paragraph, I will explore significant effects and take steps to mitigate the problems.

As
people
live
longer and the population of the
developed countries
grow older, several problems can be foreseen. The main issue is
certainly
more
people
in the
old
age
who
have to
receive a pension. The portion of working adults and younger is smaller, that means the
government
will receive less money in taxes.
Moreover
, most
elderly
in this
age
(55-60) tend to be healthy
enough
to continue their jobs.
Therefore
, the authorities should
change
the policy about the retirement
age
of employees and raise the pension
age
to 60 or even 65 depending on the health of the individual.

In addition
, a
further
crisis at the cost of retirement
age
is an increase of the burden on adolescents due to the fact that they
have to
pay taxes for themselves and to support the
elderly
. That means adults takes most of the time and energy to look after their
elderly
relatives.
Therefore
, an approach to solve this problem may involve the
government
establishing
some
laws to encourage the households to give more births. That
helps
to replace the
ageing
population in the future and refreshing the population structure.

In conclusion
, the world has developed
rapidly
in recent years and it has
positive
impacts on the average life expectancy.
However
, the pension issue and increasing number of
elderly
are weighing down on the economy to solve these problems, the
government
should adjust the retirement
age
and promoting families to give more births.
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IELTS essay Impact of ageing population

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
291 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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