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Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Infrastructure development is one of the most important governments' concerns in the last decades. However, some people believe that spending money on railways is much better than spending on roads, I would argue that roads are as much important as railways and governments should allocate appropriate funding for both. One of the most important benefits of developing train systems is enabling people reach any far city in the shortest time. For instance, when people take train in order to travel to a long distance destination, they will arrive in a shorter time than if they choose to take any vehicle on the road because they will escape from traffic jam. Thus, improving the railway system will facilitate people getting into their remote destination. On the other hand, allocating appropriate fund on roads is rather important for both children who are will to go to their schools and adults who want to reach their work place. For example, trains will not be able to go every corner of the city and therefore they are not suitable for most of children and employees who require getting their schools and work places in certain street safely and easily. That is why upgrading the roads enable people reach anywhere in a city or even in rural areas. In addition, having a well developed roads affects the trade even it is local or international trade and thus if the roads are not developed enough, customers will refuse getting into some of the traders. Because of those reasons, putting attention and spending money on roads is crucial. In conclusion, although spending money on railway may help some people getting their destinations rapidly, I believe allocating money on roads is a necessary as well because people may reach anywhere easily and this will reflect on the national and international trade.
Infrastructure development is one of the most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
' concerns in the last decades.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
is much better than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spending
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
, I would argue that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
are as much
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
should allocate appropriate funding for both.

One of the most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
benefits of developing train systems is enabling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reach
any far city in the shortest time.
For instance
, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
take train in order to travel to a long distance destination, they will arrive in a shorter time than if they choose to take any vehicle on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they will escape from traffic jam.
Thus
, improving the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railway
system will facilitate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
getting into their remote destination.

On the other hand
, allocating appropriate fund on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
is
rather
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
for both children who
Please check whether one of these words is redundant.
are will
to go to their schools and adults who want to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reach
their work place.
For example
, trains will not be able to go every corner of the city and
therefore
they are not suitable for
After ‘most of’, you should use ‘the’ (“most of the children”) or simply say “most children”.
most of children
and employees who require getting their schools and work places in certain street
safely
and
easily
.
That is
why upgrading the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
enable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reach
anywhere in a city or even in rural areas.
In addition
, having a
This word is normally spelled with a hyphen.
well developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
affects the trade even it is local or international trade and
thus
if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
are not developed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
, customers will refuse getting into
If the text is a generality, ‘of the’ is not necessary.
some of the
traders.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of those reasons, putting attention and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
is crucial.

In conclusion
, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railway
may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
getting their destinations
rapidly
, I believe allocating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
is a necessary
as well
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
may
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reach
anywhere
easily
and this will reflect on the national and international trade.
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IELTS essay Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
303 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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