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Government should spend money on railways rather than on roads To what extent do you agree or disagree

Government should spend money on railways rather than on roads 3aLmb
With the development of the transportation system. Roads and railways are most used by people. Some are of the viewpoint that management should devote more fund on railway rather than roads. From my perspective, both system are equally important and my points are discussed in the ensuing paragraphs There are many reason for more fund reqire in railways. To begin with, the foremost one is cheap way of transport, train can carry thousands of people and tones of goods at a time through railways line for shorter or longer distance this make the cost of transportation very cheaper ythat is the reason people uses more railways For that government need to allocate more fund so that more railways line will be build up. Furthermore, more funds are needed for building up new platform, along with that more facility is needed like waiting room, medical facility, toilet and to maintain the hygiene and cleanliness of station and train more worker are needed all this require lots of money On the contrary side people who support the second idea of counstructing road To embark with, During emergency, roadways is the best option as it can be available on time and can be move to anywhere without waiting. Apart from that people use road on daily basis to reach destination like office, school and many more for that huge money is reqired to maintaine the road otherwise road accident may happen. moreover more highways are need to construct to connect rural and urban area For that large sum of money to be invested. To conclude all, Roads and railways are equally important and are major part of life and government should devote funds according to the circumstances and requirement.
With the development of the transportation system.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Roads
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
are most
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
are of the viewpoint that management should devote more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fund
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railway
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
. From my perspective, both system are
equally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
and my points
are discussed
in the ensuing
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
paragraphs


There are
Possible agreement error. The noun reason seems to be countable; consider using: "many reasons".
many reason
for more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fund
Possible spelling mistake found.
reqire
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, the foremost one is
Please check whether an article is missing: "a cheap".
cheap
way of transport, train can carry thousands of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and tones of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
at a time through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
line for shorter or longer distance this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the cost of transportation
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
cheaper
Possible spelling mistake found.
ythat
is the reason
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
uses
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
For that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
need to allocate more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fund
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
line will be build up.
Furthermore
, more funds
are needed
for building up new platform, along with that more facility
is needed
like waiting room, medical facility, toilet and to maintain the hygiene and cleanliness of station and train
Use only "worker" (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
more worker
are needed
all
The verb 'require' is plural. Did you mean: "this requires"? Did you use a verb instead of a noun?
this require
lots of money

On the contrary
side
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who support the second
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of
Possible spelling mistake found.
counstructing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
To embark with, During emergency, roadways is the best option as it can be available on time and can be
Consider using a past participle here: "moved".
move
to anywhere without waiting. Apart from that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
on daily basis to reach destination like office, school and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more for that huge money is
Possible spelling mistake found.
reqired
to
Possible spelling mistake found.
maintaine
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
otherwise
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
accident may happen.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
moreover
more highways
are need
to construct to connect rural and urban area For that large sum of money to
be invested
.

To conclude
all,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Roads
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
are
equally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
and are major part of life and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should devote funds according to the circumstances and requirement.
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IELTS essay Government should spend money on railways rather than on roads

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
286 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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