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Government should ban extreme sports . Do you agree or disagree ?

Government should ban extreme sports. 6xQ88
In sophisticated scenario, adventurous games are flourishing internationally with each passing day. However, it is often argued that these sports should be prohibited. Personally, I disagree with this ideology, and I believe that risky sports paly a vital role socially and economically for an engager. To embark on, there are number of reasons why risk involving games ought not to be restricted. Firstly, when a player pursues these dangerous activities, he grasps various new qualities. As the person become fearless, courageous. Such things drive the person to cope up with all troubles. Consequently, a holistic development is attained by the players. Secondly, there traits enables a person to posses a bright cover ahead by participating in those competitions which require the skills that he has pursued from risky games. Probably further, the player who take part in suck kind of games, their economics status gets strengthen. The achievers get a good status symbol by acquiring name and fame in the society. The person becomes limelight among speculators. For instance; AJ Hackett is famous for his performance in bungee jumping and this leads him to be one out of the top rated personalities worldwide just owing to his dedication towards extreme games. In conclusion, although these games are extremely dangerous, in my opinion the above mentioned points are good group to reject the nation from banning pitfall sports.
In sophisticated scenario, adventurous
games
are flourishing
internationally
with each passing day.
However
, it is
often
argued that these sports should
be prohibited
.
Personally
, I disagree with this ideology, and I believe that risky sports
paly
a vital role
socially
and
economically
for an
engager
.

To embark on, there are number of reasons why
risk
involving
games
ought not to
be restricted
.
Firstly
, when a player pursues these
dangerous
activities, he grasps various new qualities. As the
person
become fearless, courageous. Such things drive the
person
to cope up with all troubles.
Consequently
, a holistic development
is attained
by the players.
Secondly
, there traits enables a
person
to posses a bright cover ahead by participating in those competitions which require the
skills
that he has pursued from risky games.

Probably
further
, the player who
take part
in suck kind of
games
, their economics status
gets
strengthen. The achievers
get
a
good
status symbol by acquiring name and fame in the society. The
person
becomes limelight among speculators.
For instance
; AJ
Hackett
is
famous
for his performance in bungee jumping and this leads him to be one out of the top rated personalities worldwide
just
owing to his dedication towards extreme games.

In conclusion
, although these
games
are
extremely
dangerous
, in my opinion the above mentioned points are
good
group to reject the nation from banning pitfall sports.
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IELTS essay Government should ban extreme sports.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
227 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
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  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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