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Genetic engineering is an important issue in modern society. Some people think that it will improve people's lives in many ways. Others feel that it may be a threat to life on earth. v.1

Genetic engineering is an important issue in modern society. Some people think that it will improve people's lives in many ways. Others feel that it may be a threat to life on earth. v. 1
The Growing number of unemployed people and the ones without shelter has become a burning issue in numerous nations across the globe. Some folks opine that it is the responsibility of authorities to look after people without work and home. In the following essay, I largely agree with this statement To begin with, with the ever increasing population and the inability of the bureaucrats to create employment, numerous people across the country are living below the poverty line. Hence, it is the need of the hour for the bureaucrats to create jobs in the agricultural sector and equip the nationals in such skills where there is no dearth of jobs. Furthermore, till the time they are unemployed, the government should support them financially and can also aid them with a loan to start their own business. For example, in a recent survey in India, it has been observed that the government initiatives in educating people to make them skilful resulted in many small scale entrepreneurs. To add further, in the major cities, where impoverished even don't have a shelter to live, it becomes difficult to survive under extreme hot/cold climate conditions, which sometimes results in loss of life. Hence, the authorities should build temporary arrangements for accommodation with food and health facilities during peak summer and winter and in parallel work on housing projects to make affordable housing options. To conclude, it's the responsibility of the government to give utmost importance to employment and housing, so that their citizens can work and earn and can better take care of their families.
The Growing number of unemployed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and the ones without shelter has become a burning issue in numerous nations across the globe.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
folks opine that it is the responsibility of authorities to look after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
without work and home. In the following essay, I
largely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
statement


To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, with the
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
ever increasing
population and the inability of the bureaucrats to create employment, numerous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
across the country are living below the poverty line.
Hence
, it is the need of the hour for the bureaucrats to create jobs in the agricultural sector and equip the nationals in such
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
where there is no dearth of jobs.
Furthermore
, till the time they
are unemployed
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should support them
financially
and can
also
aid them with a loan to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
business.
For example
, in a recent survey in India, it has
been observed
that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
initiatives in educating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them
Possible spelling mistake. 'skilful' is British English.
skilful
resulted in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
scale entrepreneurs.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
further
, in the major cities, where impoverished even don't have a shelter to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
, it becomes difficult to survive under extreme hot/
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cold
climate conditions, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
results in loss of life.
Hence
, the authorities should build temporary arrangements for accommodation with food and health facilities during peak summer and winter and in parallel work on housing projects to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
affordable housing options.

To conclude
, it's the responsibility of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
to give utmost importance to employment and housing,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that their citizens can work and earn and can better take care of their families.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Genetic engineering is an important issue in modern society. Some people think that it will improve people's lives in many ways. Others feel that it may be a threat to life on earth. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
261 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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