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Furthermore, it not only benefits indivuals in a lot of ways, it also avails the nation altogether. Art museums and works of art are playing an important role for attracting cultural tourists to cities and regions from all over the world. And, it creates opportunity to get job simply in the job market for artists. In brief, investing in art has a great return financially while improving the reputation of the country.

Furthermore, it not only benefits indivuals in a lot of ways, it also avails the nation altogether. Art museums and works of art are playing an important role for attracting cultural tourists to cities and regions from all over the world. And, it creates opportunity to get job simply in the job market for artists. In brief, investing in art has a great return financially while improving the reputation of the country. Jor75
Furthermore, it not only benefits indivuals in a lot of ways, it also avails the nation altogether. Art museums and works of art are playing an important role for attracting cultural tourists to cities and regions from all over the world. And, it creates opportunity to get job simply in the job market for artists. In brief, investing in art has a great return financially while improving the reputation of the country.
Furthermore
, it not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
benefits
Possible spelling mistake found.
indivuals
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
ways, it
also
avails the nation altogether. Art museums and works of art are playing an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role for attracting cultural tourists to cities and regions from all over the world. And, it creates opportunity to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
job
simply
in the job market for artists.
In brief
, investing in art has a great return
financially
while improving the reputation of the country.

IELTS essay Furthermore, it not only benefits indivuals in a lot of ways, it also avails the nation altogether. Art museums and works of art are playing an important role for attracting cultural tourists to cities and regions from all over the world. And, it creates opportunity to get job simply in the job market for artists. In brief, investing in art has a great return financially while improving the reputation of the country.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
72 words
This writing has been penalized,
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less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • Furthermore, it not only benefits indivuals in a lot of ways, it also avails the nation altogether. Art museums and works of art are playing an important role for attracting cultural tourists to cities and regions from all over the world. And, it creates opportunity to get job simply in the job market for artists. In brief, investing in art has a great return financially while improving the reputation of the country.