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Full time University students spend most of the time studying they should be doing other activities too. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

Full time University students spend most of the time studying they should be doing other activities too. gQ8l
Education and sports both play a vital role in student's life. I totally agree with the given statement which claim that students who are doing full time education should also participate in other activities. I shall discuss my views in upcoming paragraphs. To begin with, there are some reasons why students should not only focus on their studies. First and foremost is that if they will spend all the time with books then it can lead to many health problems. For example, it can be more stressful and they will prone to the depression and it can also results to suicide cases. It would become boring to read books all the time. Secondly, the students who spend a lot of time on books their mind will not be more active and living a sedentary lifestyle. As a result, it can be risk of being overweight. Students can face many health diseases. In addition, if kids do not learn any social skills then they will not be able to spend time with their friends. However, they should also participate in other curriculum activities. It would be beneficial for their physical and mental development. Students should play some outdoor games such as cricket, volleyball, football and so on. By playing these games they would learn team work, maintain their fitness and learn social skills. There are many competitions of sports held in schools and children should take part in those competitions. They would feel more relaxed these activities and they can easily concentrate on their studies as well. So I believe that students who spend more time in study gain good knowledge but to learn other skills they should participate in these activities. In conclusion, it is necessary to spend more time on books but to be active they should do other activities which can be benefit for their health and can learn other skills.
Education and sports both play a vital role in student's life. I
totally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
statement which claim that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who are doing full
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
education should
also
participate in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
. I shall discuss my views in upcoming paragraphs.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
focus on their studies.
First
and foremost is that if they will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
then it can lead to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
health problems.
For example
, it can be more
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
stressful and
they
It seems that a verb or adverb has been misspelled or is missing here.
will prone
to the depression and it can
also
The verb 'can' requires the base form of the verb: "result"
results
to suicide cases. It would become boring to read
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
.
Secondly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
their mind will not be more active and living a sedentary lifestyle.
As a result
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of being overweight.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
can face
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
health diseases.
In addition
, if kids do not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
any social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
then they will not be able to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with their friends.

However
, they should
also
participate in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
curriculum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
. It would be beneficial for their physical and mental development.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
should play
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
outdoor games such as cricket, volleyball, football and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on. By playing these games they would
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
team work, maintain their fitness and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
competitions of sports held in schools and children should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
take part
in those competitions. They would feel more relaxed these
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
activities and
they can
easily
concentrate on their studies
as well
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
in study gain
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
knowledge
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
they should participate in these activities.

In conclusion
, it is necessary to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
to be active they should do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
which can be benefit for their health and can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
.
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IELTS essay Full time University students spend most of the time studying they should be doing other activities too.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
313 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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