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FOR SCHOOL CHILDREN THEIR TEACHERS HAVE MOE INFLUENCE ON THEIR INTELLIGENCE AND SOCIAL DEVELOPMENT THAN THEIR PARENTS. TO WHAT EXTENT DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE? v.2

FOR SCHOOL CHILDREN THEIR TEACHERS HAVE MOE INFLUENCE ON THEIR INTELLIGENCE AND SOCIAL DEVELOPMENT THAN THEIR PARENTS. v. 2
OFFSPRINGS BREEEDING DEPEND ON HOW THEY ARE TREATED DURING THEIR CHILDHOOD. SO, THE MENTOR HAS MORE CONCERN ABOUT THE CHILD'S ENHANCEMENT AND CLEVERNESS IN COMPARE TO THEIR GURDIAN BECAUSE OF THE SEVERAL REASONS. FIRSTLY, THIS ESSAY WILL NOT CONCUR COMPLETELLY WITH THE ABOVE NOTION OWING TO DIFFERENT SITUATION OF DOING THIS AND SECONDLY, WILL DISCUSS WHY IT IS MORE ESSENTIAL FOR PARENTS TO LOOK AFTE THOER OFFSPRINGS THAN MENTORS. ON THE ONE HAND, THE PRIME REASON BEHIND THE MENTOR CONCERN IS THE GOVERNEMENT'S RULE. AS PER THE REGIME LAW, IT IS A RESPOMSIOBILITY OF A MENTOR TO ENHACE THE GROWTH OF INTELLIENCE IN TODDLER LEARNERS. OWNING TO THE FACT THAT, THE MENOTRS HAVE MORE ACADEMIC KNOWLEDGE AND EXPERIENCE OF TREATING SMALL AGE JUVENILS THAN PARENTS. FOR EXAMPLE, AS PER THE GOVERNMENT RULE OF THE INDIA, 80% OF WORKING GURDIAN SENT THEIR JUVENILES FOR KINDER GARDEN TRAINING TO BUILD THE SOCIAL AND CLEAVERNESS WITHIN THE OFFSPRING. ON THE OTHER HAND, PARENTS DO NOT HAVE ENOUGH TIME TO SPEND WITH THEIR KIDS DUE TO THE BUSY DAILY LIFE AND HENCE, THEY ALWAY RELY ON THE TEACHERS FOR THE BETTER BREEDING OF THEI KIDS IN THE MEANS OPF MAKING THEM SOCIALIZ AND INCREASE THEIR INTELLIGENCE. FOR INSTANCE, ACCORDING TO THE AFRICAN TODDLER UPBRINGING DATA, 60% OF AFRICAN PARENTS DO THE SAME AS MOST OF THEM STRUGLING WITH THEIR PROFESSIONAL AND PERSONAL LIFE BALANCE. IN CONCLUSION, IT IS UNTOLD TRUTH THAT PARENTS AND TEACHERS BOTH PLAY AN VITAL ROLE IN SCHOOL LIFE AS OFFSPRING HAS SOMETHING TO LEARN FROM BOTH. THEREFORE, I SUGGEST, RATHER THAN RELY ON TEACHERS, IF PARENTS ALLOTE THEIR PRECIOUS TIME FOR THEIR KIDS THAN THE KIDS OULD BE MORE AWARE AND INTELLIGENT.
Possible spelling mistake found.
OFFSPRINGS
Possible spelling mistake found.
BREEEDING
DEPEND ON HOW THEY
ARE TREATED
DURING THEIR CHILDHOOD.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
SO
, THE MENTOR HAS MORE CONCERN ABOUT THE CHILD'S ENHANCEMENT AND CLEVERNESS IN COMPARE TO THEIR
Possible spelling mistake found.
GURDIAN
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
BECAUSE
OF THE SEVERAL REASONS.
FIRSTLY
, THIS ESSAY WILL NOT CONCUR
Possible spelling mistake found.
COMPLETELLY
WITH THE ABOVE NOTION OWING TO
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
DIFFERENT
SITUATION OF DOING THIS AND
SECONDLY
, WILL DISCUSS WHY IT IS MORE ESSENTIAL FOR
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
PARENTS
TO LOOK
Possible spelling mistake found.
AFTE
Possible spelling mistake found.
THOER
Possible spelling mistake found.
OFFSPRINGS
THAN MENTORS.

ON THE ONE HAND, THE PRIME REASON BEHIND THE MENTOR CONCERN IS THE
Possible spelling mistake found.
GOVERNEMENT
'S
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
RULE
. AS PER THE REGIME LAW, IT IS A
Possible spelling mistake found.
RESPOMSIOBILITY
OF A MENTOR TO
Possible spelling mistake found.
ENHACE
THE GROWTH OF
Possible spelling mistake found.
INTELLIENCE
IN TODDLER LEARNERS. OWNING TO THE FACT THAT, THE
Possible spelling mistake found.
MENOTRS
HAVE MORE ACADEMIC KNOWLEDGE AND EXPERIENCE OF TREATING
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
SMALL
AGE
Possible spelling mistake found.
JUVENILS
THAN
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
PARENTS
.
FOR EXAMPLE
, AS PER THE
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
GOVERNMENT
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
RULE
OF THE INDIA, 80% OF WORKING
Possible spelling mistake found.
GURDIAN
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
SENT
THEIR JUVENILES FOR KINDER GARDEN TRAINING TO BUILD THE SOCIAL AND
Possible spelling mistake found.
CLEAVERNESS
WITHIN THE OFFSPRING.

ON THE OTHER HAND
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
PARENTS
DO NOT HAVE
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
ENOUGH
TIME TO SPEND WITH THEIR
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
KIDS
DUE TO THE BUSY DAILY LIFE AND
HENCE
, THEY
Possible spelling mistake found.
ALWAY
RELY ON THE TEACHERS FOR THE BETTER BREEDING OF
Possible spelling mistake found.
THEI
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
KIDS
IN THE MEANS
Possible spelling mistake found.
OPF
MAKING THEM
Possible spelling mistake found.
SOCIALIZ
AND INCREASE THEIR INTELLIGENCE.
FOR INSTANCE
, ACCORDING TO THE AFRICAN TODDLER UPBRINGING DATA, 60% OF AFRICAN
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
PARENTS
DO THE SAME AS MOST OF THEM
Possible spelling mistake found.
STRUGLING
WITH THEIR PROFESSIONAL AND PERSONAL LIFE BALANCE.

IN CONCLUSION
, IT IS UNTOLD TRUTH THAT
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
PARENTS
AND TEACHERS BOTH PLAY AN VITAL ROLE IN SCHOOL LIFE AS OFFSPRING HAS SOMETHING TO LEARN FROM BOTH.
THEREFORE
, I SUGGEST,
RATHER
THAN RELY ON TEACHERS, IF
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
PARENTS
Possible spelling mistake found.
ALLOTE
THEIR PRECIOUS TIME FOR THEIR
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
KIDS
THAN THE
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
KIDS
Possible spelling mistake found.
OULD
BE MORE AWARE AND INTELLIGENT.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay FOR SCHOOL CHILDREN THEIR TEACHERS HAVE MOE INFLUENCE ON THEIR INTELLIGENCE AND SOCIAL DEVELOPMENT THAN THEIR PARENTS. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
282 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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