Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Fatherhood ought to be emphasized as much as motherhood. The idea that women are solely responsible for deciding whether or not to have babies leads on to the idea that they are also responsible for bringing the children up

Fatherhood ought to be emphasized as much as motherhood. The idea that women are solely responsible for deciding whether or not to have babies leads on to the idea that they are also responsible for bringing the children up y6XE
Gone are the days when people thought that mother is solely responsible for bringing up her children, however, nowadays both mother as well as father plays an equal contribution for raising up their children. In this contemporary world, there is heated debate about the fact whether it is the sole responsibility of mother to nourish her child or both the parents should emphasize on the growth of their children. A lion share of society agrees with latter statement. As per my perspective, it is the duty of both parents to look after their children and make them a well social being persons. To embark on, I see eye to eye with the central idea that father and mother should play an equal and essential role in bringing up their children. Moreover, parents are the one who always wish to make their children a social well being. Apart from this, both father and mother have enriched experience of various ups and downs of life and guide their children well how to face challenges and struggle in the hard times. Furthermore, they are the first teachers of their children and juveniles also learn the things which they have been guided by their parents more rapidly. However, single parent is not enough strong to manage all such things properly and ultimately results lacks in nourishment of a child. Shedding lights on the above said reasons, it is clear that it is an obligation of both parents to foster the growth of their child. It is rightly said that if mother and father mutually decide to have a baby then it is also the commitment of both ones to breed their children with each other support and guidance so that, they can shine the name of their parents. Having said that, I would like to emphasize on the statement that both parents should concentrate on the personal development of their children. To recapitulate, although single parent can nourish his/her own babies, yet to my mind, it is the job of both parents to support, guide, educate and feed their children.
Gone
Consider using third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: "is".
are
the days when
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mother
is
solely
responsible for bringing up her
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
,
however
, nowadays both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mother
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
father
plays an equal contribution for raising up their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. In this contemporary world, there
is heated
debate about the fact whether it is the sole responsibility of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mother
to nourish her child or both the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
should emphasize on the growth of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. A lion share of society
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agrees
with latter statement. As per my perspective, it is the duty of both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
to look after their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
social being persons.

To embark on, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
eye to eye with the central
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
father
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mother
should play an equal and essential role in bringing up their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
are the one who always wish to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
a social
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
well being
. Apart from this, both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
father
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mother
have enriched experience of various ups and downs of life and guide their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
how to face challenges and struggle in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
times.
Furthermore
, they are the
first
teachers of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
and juveniles
also
learn the things which they have
been guided
by their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
more
rapidly
.
However
, single
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parent
is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
strong to manage all such things
properly
and
ultimately
results lacks in nourishment of a child.

Shedding lights on the above said reasons, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that it is an obligation of both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
to foster the growth of their child. It is
rightly
said that if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mother
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
father
mutually
decide to have a baby then it is
also
the commitment of both ones to breed their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
with each other support and guidance
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that, they can shine the name of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
. Having said that, I would like to emphasize on the statement that both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
should concentrate on the personal development of their children.

To recapitulate, although single
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parent
can nourish his/her
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
babies,
yet
to my mind, it is the job of both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
to support, guide, educate and feed their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Fatherhood ought to be emphasized as much as motherhood. The idea that women are solely responsible for deciding whether or not to have babies leads on to the idea that they are also responsible for bringing the children up

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
346 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts