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Farming is the backbone of every country but nowadays many youngsters hesitate to enter in this profession. Why is this the case and what can be done to avoid it?

Farming is the backbone of every country but nowadays many youngsters hesitate to enter in this profession. Why is this the case and what can be done to avoid it? kY6bM
Agriculture cultivation is a precious thing for every nation. However, the majority of young people do not their profession in farming these days. Firstly, this essay discusses the main reasons associated with this notion and in the latter half, will explore few ways to avoid it. There are a couple of reasons when it comes to choosing a profession in agriculture, especially for youngsters. First of all, teenagers do not choose this profession because of hard work and low pay scale. To be specific, they need to work for several days by facing the extremely hot sun and rain without thinking about the consequences. Hence, young individuals choose the other profession compared to this one. Secondly, many humankind does not have farming land to cultivate. For instance, half of the human beings in India cannot have farming land to irrigate in their life. As a result, youngsters try to get the job in different fields to support their family through financially without having an interest in the work. However, despite the severity of the reasons, there are many ways to avoid it more efficiently. The most significant one is government authorities provide land to poor class and middle-class families to enhance their career towards success in agriculture. In addition, it improves the agriculture sector as well as the national gross domestic product. Another pivotal point is children need to learn about farming through their parents and teachers at their early age about the importance of cultivation. If young people had learnt about farming in their school-age, each country would not have suffered in this sector. For instance, because of low farmers and high technology jobs, Americans are suffering a lot in their consumption of proper organic food. To conclude, higher officials implementation of certain measures and young people interest can eliminate the reasons and can choose the farming profession.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Agriculture
cultivation is a precious thing for every nation.
However
, the majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
do not their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
profession
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
farming
these days.
Firstly
, this essay discusses the main
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
associated with this notion and in the latter half, will explore few ways to avoid it.

There are a couple of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to choosing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
profession
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
agriculture
,
especially
for youngsters.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
do not choose this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
profession
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
work and low pay scale. To be specific, they need to work for several days by facing the
extremely
hot sun and rain without thinking about the consequences.
Hence
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
individuals choose the other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
profession
compared to this one.
Secondly
,
Possible agreement error. The noun humankind seems to be uncountable; consider using: "much humankind", "a good deal of humankind".
many humankind
does not have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
farming
land to cultivate.
For instance
, half of the human beings in India cannot have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
farming
land to irrigate in their life.
As a result
, youngsters try to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the job in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
fields to support their family through
financially
without having an interest in the work.

However
, despite the severity of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways to avoid it more
efficiently
. The most significant one is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
authorities provide land to poor
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
and middle-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
families to enhance their career towards success in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
agriculture
.
In addition
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
agriculture
sector
as well
as the national gross domestic product. Another pivotal point is children need to learn about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
farming
through their parents and teachers at their early age about the importance of cultivation. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
had
Possible spelling mistake. 'learnt' is British English.
learnt
about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
farming
in their school-age, each country would not have suffered in this sector.
For instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of low farmers and high technology jobs, Americans are suffering a lot in their consumption of proper organic food.

To conclude
, higher
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "officials'" or "official's"?
officials
implementation of certain measures and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
interest can eliminate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
and can choose the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
farming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
profession
.
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IELTS essay Farming is the backbone of every country but nowadays many youngsters hesitate to enter in this profession. Why is this the case and what can be done to avoid it?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
309 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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