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Essay topics: A builder worked in your house a few weeks ago. You did not like the result of his work. Write a letter to him and say. - Describe the work you wanted him to do. - What is your complaint about his job? - What do you expect him to do about it? v.1

Essay topics: A builder worked in your house a few weeks ago. You did not like the result of his work. Write a letter to him and say. - Describe the work you wanted him to do. - What is your complaint about his job? - What do you expect him to do about it? v. 1
In the urban area, the security has been improved due to the crime restriction. The measures introduced may cause the benefits and the drawbacks to the society. However, I believe that those measures possess more benefits to the urban dwellers. Living in urban areas has its own challenge for some people. The highly competitive aspects such as high cost of living leads the struggle of the poor. While trying to cope with the realities of a city life, some people may become a wrongdoer to stay alive. Therefore to prevent this, the government applies the strict rules, particularly in public areas, such as conducting security checks before entering a mall, taking measures for any suspicious activity in people and so forth. However, the rule might cause difficulties, because people cannot experience their activity freely. On the other hand, as a result of improving the security, people won't longer worry about their belongings or placing their vehicles in the parking area, because they feel safe. In addition, the parents will be more convenient to let their children outside the home. Indeed, the applied tight rules in public area constrict the wrongdoer to conduct their acts. Hence, the offenders might think twice before doing the crime. In conclusion, enhancing the security in urban area is undoubtedly leads many benefits than its drawbacks. However, the government had better not only prevent the wrongdoer to act, but also looks for its causes, considering the crime happens not because of without reason. Therefore, they will diminish the crime properly.
In the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
urban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
security
has been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
due to the crime restriction. The measures introduced may cause the benefits and the drawbacks to the society.
However
, I believe that those measures possess more benefits to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
urban
dwellers.

Living in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
urban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
has its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
challenge for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. The
highly
competitive aspects such as high cost of living leads the struggle of the poor. While trying to cope with the realities of a city life,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
may become a wrongdoer to stay alive.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Therefore
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
this, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
applies the strict
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
,
particularly
in public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
, such as conducting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
security
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
checks
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
entering a mall, taking measures for any suspicious activity in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
forth.
However
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rule
might cause difficulties,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
cannot experience their activity
freely
.

On the other hand
,
as a result
of improving the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
security
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
won't longer worry about their belongings or placing their vehicles in the parking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they feel safe.
In addition
, the parents will be more convenient to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
their children outside the home.
Indeed
, the applied tight
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
in public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
constrict the wrongdoer to conduct their acts.
Hence
, the offenders might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
twice
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
doing the crime.

In conclusion
, enhancing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
security
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
urban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
is
undoubtedly
leads
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits than its drawbacks.
However
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
had better not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
the wrongdoer to act,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
looks for its causes, considering the crime happens not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of without reason.
Therefore
, they will diminish the crime
properly
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
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Munia Khan

IELTS essay Essay topics: A builder worked in your house a few weeks ago. You did not like the result of his work. Write a letter to him and say. - Describe the work you wanted him to do. - What is your complaint about his job? - What do you expect him to do about it? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
254 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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