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Environmental problems are becoming a global issue. Environmental problems are counter-challenging the quality of life people enjoy in modern advanced societies. Do you think that environmental problems will produce better results if it is addressed globally or it should be addressed by individual countries? v.3

Environmental problems are becoming a global issue. Environmental problems are counter-challenging the quality of life people enjoy in modern advanced societies. Do you think that environmental problems will produce better results if it is addressed globally or it should be addressed by individual countries? v. 3
Some environmental problems are regional like cyclones and some others are global - greenhouse effects for instance. With the span of time, most of the environmental problems are becoming global issues and I believe that global initiatives should be taken for the best result and to make the world a better place to live in. To begin with, environmental problems are generally caused by humans and while some of them are national in nature, most of them are global issues. Noise or water pollution at a time remain national problems but after a certain period, it would turn into a problem for the whole world. Thus if some environmental problems are left unaddressed due to its span in a country, it would soon become the problem for all nations. Moreover, not all nations are equally qualified to address issues of such magnitude, due to their economic and political aspects, and this is why other affluent nations should extend their helping hands to solve such problems. Rich nations contribute more to the global warming and this is why they need to build a common platform to bring all nations together to fight the environmental problems. For a poor country, it is quite tough to allocate budget for saving the greenery while millions of its population are suffering from hunger and natural disaster. This is why other rich nations have natural obligations to help those poor or developing nations. To draw the conclusion, global environmental problems like greenhouse effects, global warming etc. have already become the concern for every nation. A collaborative effort to address these problems would be a better strategy while each nation is not equally adept to solve the global problems.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
are regional like cyclones and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
others are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
-
greenhouse effects
for instance
. With the span of time, most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
are becoming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
issues and I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
initiatives should
be taken
for the best result and to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the world a better place to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
are
generally
caused by humans and while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of them are national in nature, most of them are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
issues. Noise or water pollution at a time remain national
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
after a certain period, it would turn into a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
for the whole world.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Thus
if
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
unaddressed due to its span in a country, it would
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
become the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
for all nations.

Moreover
, not all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
are
equally
qualified to address issues of such magnitude, due to their economic and political aspects, and this is why other affluent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
should extend their helping hands to solve such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
. Rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
contribute more to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
warming and this is why they need to build a common platform to bring all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
together to fight the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
. For a poor country, it is quite tough to allocate budget for saving the greenery while millions of its population are suffering from hunger and natural disaster. This is why other rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
have natural obligations to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
those poor or developing nations.

To draw the conclusion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
like greenhouse effects,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
warming etc. have already become the concern for every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
. A collaborative effort to address these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
would be a better strategy while each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
is not
equally
adept to solve the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
33Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
Learn a language, and you’ll avoid a war.
Arab Proverb

IELTS essay Environmental problems are becoming a global issue. Environmental problems are counter-challenging the quality of life people enjoy in modern advanced societies. Do you think that environmental problems will produce better results if it is addressed globally or it should be addressed by individual countries? v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
282 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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