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Do you agree the tv is important for childrens.

Do you agree the tv is important for childrens. 9QrwX
In this concurrent world, it is undoubtedly true that Tv plays a significant role in our lives. Some people concur that Tv has a negative impact on our children's daily life. However, I quibble with them and propound that Tv becomes an essential success factor in everyone's childhood. Adequate pieces of evidence are obtainable to substantiate the concept of the necessity of tv for our kids. The top-notch concrete reason is this simple rectangular screen can bring and simplify the huge world for our children. To clarify this idea let's take wildlife as an example. No matter what we try to explain to our littles the life out there in the jungles, a 5 minutes video on the Tv is capable of making them living the scene like they are with them in the same place as well as it can provide them with interesting information. Another rationale that hauls me to patron is that watching Tv can be used as a motivation factor for our kids to push them in the path of doing their duties and in the same way they can enjoy their spare time. A child can be asked to do his homework or whatever that is needed to be done to be rewarded giving him or her permission to watch his favorite program in this way children will be encouraged to finish their duties with a happy face. What is half full for some, may appear half-empty for others. So the public, in general, tends to distinguish that Tv can be harmful to young individuals. To commence with, some parents deem that the rays coming from tv screens can be seriously damaging for children's eyes unless they spent less than a couple of hours watching Tv. Withal they also uphold that watching time can be time-consuming which can have a negative impact on their academic life. Some parents are adamant that young individuals must spend more time reading and studying rather than watching tv at all. In recapitulation, I reiterate that there are innumerable strong factors supporting the importance of Tv for children. However, its contrary can be overlooked or controlled. Consequently, I firmly agree that children must have time for Tv but under their parents' moderating.
In this concurrent world, it is
undoubtedly
true that
Tv
plays a significant role in our
lives
.
Some
people
concur that
Tv
has a
negative
impact on our children's daily life.
However
, I quibble with them and propound that
Tv
becomes an essential success factor in everyone's childhood.

Adequate pieces of evidence are obtainable to substantiate the concept of the necessity of
tv
for our kids. The top-notch concrete reason is this simple rectangular screen can bring and simplify the huge world for our
children
. To clarify this
idea
let
's take wildlife as an example. No matter what we try to
explain
to our
littles
the life out there in the jungles, a 5 minutes video on the
Tv
is capable of making them living the scene like they are with them in the same place
as well
as it can provide them with interesting information. Another rationale that hauls me to patron is that watching
Tv
can be
used
as a motivation factor for our kids to push them in the path of doing their duties and
in the same way
they can enjoy their spare
time
. A child can
be asked
to do his homework or whatever that
is needed
to
be done
to
be rewarded
giving him or her permission to
watch
his favorite program in this way
children
will
be encouraged
to finish their duties with a happy face.

What is half full for
some
, may appear half-empty for others.
So
the public,
in general
, tends to distinguish that
Tv
can be harmful to young individuals. To commence with,
some
parents deem that the rays coming from
tv
screens can be
seriously
damaging for children's eyes unless they spent less than a couple of hours watching
Tv
. Withal they
also
uphold that watching
time
can be time-consuming which can have a
negative
impact on their academic life.
Some
parents are adamant that young individuals
must
spend more
time
reading and studying
rather
than watching
tv
at all.

In recapitulation, I reiterate that there are innumerable strong factors supporting the importance of
Tv
for
children
.
However
, its contrary can
be overlooked
or controlled.
Consequently
, I
firmly
agree
that
children
must
have
time
for
Tv
but
under their parents' moderating.
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IELTS essay Do you agree the tv is important for childrens.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
372 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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