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Describe an important choice you had to make in your life. You should say: When you had this choiceWhat you had to choose betweenWhether you made a good choiceAnd explain how you felt when you were making this choice v. 1

These days women are contributing to almost every profession compared to the past. A part of the society said that women should also get the same opportunity as men on the military force, while others seem to disagree with it. In this case, I agree that women could take equal rights as men in the army. In the next paragraph, I will show some of my perspectives and give additional cases. First of all, gender equality is a very important thing in every aspect. Gender equality does not always mean that women want to be the same as men. However, it is about the rights that women should get proportionately. For example, women should get paid equivalently instead of lower than men, just because of their gender. On the contrary, many people assume that women's physical features are built to be not as strong as men. From what I know, not all women are weak. Also, if they want to enter for military, they do not always need to be in the same role as men. For instance, one of my friend's mom is an army officer in the health department. It shows that to join the military, does not mean that you should go to the field and fight. In conclusion, we should support and respect women's right to decide whatever job they want to do. Particularly in this topic, in the soldiery that women often get disparaged just because of their physical look. Women can play an equal role as men, vice versa.

IELTS essay Describe an important choice you had to make in your life. You should say: When you had this choiceWhat you had to choose betweenWhether you made a good choiceAnd explain how you felt when you were making this choice v.1

These days
women
are contributing to almost every profession compared to the past. A part of the society said that
women
should
also
get
the same opportunity as
men
on the military force, while others seem to disagree with it.
In this case
, I
agree
that
women
could take equal rights as
men
in the army. In the
next
paragraph, I will
show
some
of my perspectives and give additional cases.

First of all
, gender equality is a
very
important
thing in every aspect. Gender equality does not always mean that
women
want to be the same as
men
.
However
, it is about the rights that
women
should
get
proportionately
.
For example
,
women
should
get
paid
equivalently
instead
of lower than
men
,
just
because
of their gender.

On the contrary
,
many
people
assume that women's physical features
are built
to be not as strong as
men
. From what I know, not all
women
are weak.
Also
, if they want to enter for military, they do not always need to be in the same role as
men
.
For instance
, one of my friend's mom is an army officer in the health department. It
shows
that to
join
the military, does not mean that you should go to the field and fight.

In conclusion
, we should support and respect women's right to decide whatever job they want to do.
Particularly
in this topic, in the soldiery that
women
often
get
disparaged
just
because
of their physical look.
Women
can play an equal role as
men
, vice versa.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
I love commuting between languages just like I love commuting between cultures and cities.
Elif Safak
Essay
4 paragraphs
255 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resources: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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