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Describe a bag you want to work

Describe a bag you want to work 5LXgB
Well I like to wear different types of brands and colours but here I would like to talk about one particular brand and colour which is always special to me this bag as a locking system and the Bluetooth system my friend brought this bag from United States it has been imported one I want to buy this bag because this banks looks and attracting by the colour and brand as a quality also I want to buy back in shopping malls which you a pure guarantee of hundred percent without any doubt the cost of the bag is around 60 $20 in my life but it cost maybe increase or decrease I didn’t ask my friend according to the cost of this because I have completely forgot it about the cost by looking this bag and colour the most advantages of this bad ass due to system whichEasily identify the location of bank will be kept it and moreover it is hundred percent sure no one can be store from anyone what is the main advantages it attract me a lot because I am a traveller I need to have a travel bag which has a lot of ways it is like Bluetooth it has me when I was tired when I forgot to eat it can be helped me to get easily identified by it by the location and the GPS system
Well I like to wear
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
types of brands and
Possible spelling mistake. 'colours' is British English.
colours
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
here I would like to talk about one particular brand and
Possible spelling mistake. 'colour' is British English.
colour
which is always special to me this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bag
as a locking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
and the Bluetooth
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
my friend brought this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bag
A determiner is probably missing here: "from the United States".
from United States
it has
been imported
one I want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bag
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
this banks looks and attracting by the
Possible spelling mistake. 'colour' is British English.
colour
and brand as a quality
also
I want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
back in shopping malls which you a pure guarantee of hundred percent without any doubt the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bag
is around
The currency mark is usually put at the beginning of the number: "$60".
60 $
20 in my life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
maybe increase or decrease I didn’t ask my friend according to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
of this
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I have completely
Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: "forgotten".
forgot
it about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
by looking this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bag
and
Possible spelling mistake. 'colour' is British English.
colour
the most advantages of this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
ass due to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
Possible spelling mistake found.
whichEasily
identify the location of bank will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
it and
moreover
it is
Use "a hundred" or use a number before 'hundred'.
hundred
percent sure no one can be store from anyone what is the main advantages it
Did you mean "attracts"?
attract
me a lot
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I am a
Possible spelling mistake found.
traveller
I need to have a travel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bag
which has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
ways it is like Bluetooth it has me when I
was tired
when I forgot to eat it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
me to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
easily
identified by it by the location and the GPS
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system

IELTS essay Describe a bag you want to work

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
233 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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