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Cultural identity in the country of origin

Cultural identity in the country of origin NrwKd
When it comes to the culture as shared perceptions or modes of rituals and social conventions, it confirms to the statement that a person's nation of origin influences their culture. There is a controversial viewpoint about nationality as a major or minor factor in this scenario. In my perspective, both arguments have validity, but I would lean towards the latter as the accompanying ideas. On the one hand, the defining impact of culture is undoubtedly within the thoughts of general publics. A child will be controlled or instructed in the place they are born and grew up, from adolescents to adults. Many psychologists compare the humans as the products of the environment. For example, the most obvious expression is the home cuisine. The people are used to eating with a number of ingredients in their daily foods or some of the flavours are added more than the others. That is the reason why foreigners will be disappointed with the overseas meals due to their home tastes. On the other hand, as the continuous growth of globalisation, the localisation has gradually lost its nature. People get exposed to a plethora of cultures with entertainment, lifestyle, behaviours and many more. The benefits are offering the possibilities to select and develop. The majority of people in modern society possess the cultural or social identities easily from other countries since those characteristics make themselves more adaptable and state-of-the-art. What is more, overseas working opportunities are currently expanding, enabling the labour force to move and live in foreign nations. Those people then, inevitably, get access to new influences From my viewpoint, the process of adopting the foreign elements occurs every day in every single performance, but the proportion of that would depend on the preferences, tastes, and experiences. In order to constitute a human trait identity, it requires a lot of factors and globalisation is just part of that circumstance. The most defining one is people's conciousness to control and follow the path that best suits them.
When it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
as shared perceptions or modes of rituals and social conventions, it confirms to the statement that a person's nation of origin influences their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
. There is a controversial viewpoint about nationality as a major or minor factor in this scenario. In my perspective, both arguments have validity,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I would lean towards the latter as the accompanying
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
.

On the one hand, the defining impact of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
is
undoubtedly
within the thoughts of general
Possible spelling mistake found.
publics
. A child will
be controlled
or instructed in the place they
are born
and grew up, from adolescents to adults.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
psychologists compare the humans as the products of the environment.
For example
, the most obvious expression is the home cuisine. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to eating with a number of ingredients in their daily foods or
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of the
Possible spelling mistake. 'flavours' is British English.
flavours
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
added
more than the others.
That is
the reason why foreigners will
be disappointed
with the overseas meals due to their home tastes.

On the other hand
, as the continuous growth of
Possible spelling mistake. 'globalisation' is British English.
globalisation
, the
Possible spelling mistake. 'localisation' is British English.
localisation
has
gradually
lost its nature.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
exposed to a plethora of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
with entertainment, lifestyle,
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviours' is British English.
behaviours
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more. The benefits are offering the possibilities to select and develop. The majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in modern society possess the cultural or social identities
easily
from other countries since those characteristics
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
themselves more adaptable and state-of-the-art.
What is more
, overseas working opportunities are
currently
expanding, enabling the
Possible spelling mistake. 'labour' is British English.
labour
force to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in foreign nations. Those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
then,
inevitably
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
access to new influences

From my viewpoint, the process of adopting the foreign elements occurs every day in every single performance,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the proportion of that would depend on the preferences, tastes, and experiences. In order to constitute a human trait identity, it requires
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
factors and
Possible spelling mistake. 'globalisation' is British English.
globalisation
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
part of that circumstance. The most defining one is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
Possible spelling mistake found.
conciousness
to control and follow the path that best suits them.
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IELTS essay Cultural identity in the country of origin

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
332 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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