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Convincing children that hard work makes everything possible is popular in some nations. This message can be advantageous to children as it motivates them and encourages them to chase their dreams. However, it can cause some negative consequences.

Convincing children that hard work makes everything possible is popular in some nations. This message can be advantageous to children as it motivates them and encourages them to chase their dreams. However, it can cause some negative consequences. NmmRd
On the one hand, this message is beneficial to the young generation in many ways. Children usually have a lot of dreams since they are at the beginning of their lives and they think everything is possible. When adults encourage them to pursue their passions and believe in them, it pushes them to become the best version of themselves through working hard and staying positive. Another benefit is that it keeps children encouraged even when they fail. In other words, when children grow into adults and start chasing their dreams, they will surely encounter hardships. If they were taught that persistence and hard work will get them through, they will not give up and will stay motivated. On the other hand, children who believe this message may encounter some problems. Firstly, due to believing everything is possible, they may set unrealistic goals for themselves and think they can achieve them. For instance, they may think they can become millionaires at the age of fifteen and when they reach that age, they become frustrated that they did not get what they wanted. Secondly, children may push themselves to their limits and work too hard which affects them negatively. This can be exemplified by children who study all the time because they want to be top students and suffer from mental health issues such as depression, anxiety, and isolation. To conclude, although it is beneficial to tell children that working hard towards a goal always yields positive results, it can cause them issues such as frustration and burnout.
On the one hand, this message is beneficial to the young generation in
many
ways.
Children
usually
have
a lot of
dreams since they are at the beginning of their
lives and
they
think
everything is possible. When adults encourage them to pursue their passions and believe in them, it pushes them to become the best version of themselves through working
hard
and staying
positive
. Another benefit is that it
keeps
children
encouraged even when they fail.
In other words
, when
children
grow into adults and
start
chasing their dreams, they will
surely
encounter hardships. If they
were taught
that persistence and
hard
work will
get
them through, they will not give up and will stay motivated.

On the other hand
,
children
who believe this message may encounter
some
problems.
Firstly
, due to believing everything is possible, they may set unrealistic goals for themselves and
think
they can achieve them.
For instance
, they may
think
they can become millionaires at the age of fifteen and when they reach that age, they become frustrated that they did not
get
what they wanted.
Secondly
,
children
may push themselves to their limits and work too
hard
which affects them
negatively
. This can
be exemplified
by
children
who study all the time
because
they want to be top students and suffer from mental health issues such as depression, anxiety, and isolation.

To conclude
, although it is beneficial to
tell
children
that working
hard
towards a goal always yields
positive
results, it can cause them issues such as frustration and burnout.
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IELTS essay Convincing children that hard work makes everything possible is popular in some nations. This message can be advantageous to children as it motivates them and encourages them to chase their dreams. However, it can cause some negative consequences.

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
256 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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