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Computer games are very popular in all age groups and nationalities. Parents think it has little educational value it will be harmful for children. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Computer games are very popular in all age groups and nationalities. Parents think it has little educational value it will be harmful for children. jqVL
At the modern time, people get addicted to the technology. Nowadays, games play an instrumental pert in every individual's life. Parents think that computer games have some educational values as well as it will be detrimental for their children. I partially agree that computer games have little knowledge, whereas it will be harmful. In the upcoming paragraphs I will discuss tge pros and cons of playing computer games. To start with, computer games have not only side effect of children's brain but it may effect on their physical health. Computer games are generally addictive. If someone is constantly playing a game, people have to wear spectacles. It is pivotal for parents to keep an eye on their children while playing computer games, because this will effecting children's education. For example, many kids have committed suicide because they are following some a trivial and fraud website which are harmful for children. On the other hand, computer games are help kids to improve mental development. However technology is improving day by day, many children are finding some educational games. These games are help them to use their own imagination and thinking. For illustration, if a pupil is working on English subject to improve his or her scores, then games like word puzzle, complete the sentence and many more. These games will provide them good knowledge as well as children will learn everything without difficulties. If some students are not concentrating in their studies, then they can play games and clear their doubts without someone's help. Finally, I am not against children playing video games because it is providing them good activities and knowledge, but parents should be scrupulous of their kids activity. Since, it can have a negative impact on their mental growth. Computer games have educational benefits but if it is playing wisely.
At the modern time,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
addicted to the technology. Nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
play an instrumental pert in every individual's life. Parents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
educational values
as well
as it will be detrimental for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. I
partially
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
knowledge, whereas it will be harmful. In the upcoming paragraphs I will discuss
Possible spelling mistake found.
tge
pros and cons of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
computer games.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with, computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
have not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
side effect of children's brain
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it may
Did you mean "affect"?
effect
on their physical health. Computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
are
generally
addictive. If someone is
constantly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
a game,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
wear spectacles. It is pivotal for parents to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
an eye on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
this will effecting children's education.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
kids have committed suicide
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are following
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
a trivial and fraud website which are harmful for children.

On the other hand
, computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
kids to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
mental development.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
technology is improving day by day,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are finding
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
educational
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
imagination and thinking. For illustration, if a pupil is working on English subject to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
his or her
scores, then
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
like word puzzle, complete the sentence and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
will provide them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
knowledge
as well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
will learn everything without difficulties. If
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
students are not concentrating in their studies, then they can play
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
their doubts without someone's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
.

Finally
, I am not against
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is providing them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
activities and knowledge,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
parents should be scrupulous of their kids activity.
“Since” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Since
, it can have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact on their mental growth. Computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
have educational benefits
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
if it is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
wisely
.
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IELTS essay Computer games are very popular in all age groups and nationalities. Parents think it has little educational value it will be harmful for children.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
302 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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  • Computer games are very popular in all age groups and nationalities. Parents think it has little educational value it will be harmful for children. To what extent do you agree or disagree?