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In many developing countries, there is a problem with declining quality of air and water from both industry and construction. What measures could be taken to prevent this?

In many developing countries, there is a problem with declining quality of air and water from both industry and construction. What measures could be taken to prevent this? G19e
In several developing countries, there is an issue were the quality of air and water are declining from both industry and construction. There are solutions that should be taken to prevent the declining of water and air. To begin with, never had anybody thought that planting trees would help increasing the quality of the air as well as water. Planting trees surrounding the industrial areas and construction sites would accelerate the quality of water and oxygen. This is due to the fact that trees are natural filters that help purifying air and make it free of any harmful gases. Moreover, some factories doesn’t own filters in their gas extraction section; hence air pollution may increase annually. For example, China contains several factories. Majority of these factories doesn’t have these filters equipped, because of this china is considered most if the polluted country in the world. Consequently, equipping filters would improve the quality of air and eliminate air pollution. Furthermore, major causes of water pollution are water sewage treatment. Some countries throw sewage waste in rivers and lakes. Besides, construction sites dump their waste and remains in the ocean. Water pollution rate rises because of these actions. Modern technology and science could be used to treat these issues. In fact, some advanced countries like the USA, used advanced technology to remove the pollutants from the water and be normally used in cleaning or household activities. Despite this, these measures require tons of money and work. However, if we didn’t stop air and water pollution; people will have toxic water and air. Owning to the fact that consuming toxic gases and water may cause global issues and fatal diseases in the future. To sum up, having clean water and air is crucial for every human being and we must not destroy these important elements that keep us alive. The world would be a great place if we eliminated these pollutions.
In several developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, there is an issue were the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
are declining from both industry and construction. There are solutions that should
be taken
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
the declining of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
and air.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, never had anybody
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
that planting trees would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
The verb 'help' is used with an infinitive: "to increase" or "increase".
increasing
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
as well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
. Planting trees surrounding the industrial areas and construction sites would accelerate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
and oxygen.
This is due to the fact that
trees are natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
filters
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
The verb 'help' is used with an infinitive: "to purify" or "purify".
purifying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it free of any harmful gases.
Moreover
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
factories doesn’t
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
filters
in their gas extraction section;
hence
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
may increase
annually
.
For example
, China contains several factories. Majority of these factories doesn’t have these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
filters
equipped,
because of this
china
is considered
most if the polluted
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
in the world.
Consequently
, equipping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
filters
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
and eliminate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
pollution.

Furthermore
, major causes of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
sewage treatment.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
throw sewage waste in rivers and lakes.
Besides
, construction sites dump their waste and remains in the ocean.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Water
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
rate rises
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of these actions. Modern technology and science could be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to treat these issues. In fact,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
advanced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
like the USA,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
advanced technology to remove the pollutants from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
and be
normally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in cleaning or household activities.

Despite this, these measures require tons of money and work.
However
, if we didn’t
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
;
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
will have toxic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
. Owning to the fact that consuming toxic gases and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
may cause global issues and fatal diseases in the future.

To sum up, having clean
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
is crucial for every human
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
being and
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroy
these
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
elements that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
us alive. The world would be a great place if we eliminated these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollutions
.
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IELTS essay In many developing countries, there is a problem with declining quality of air and water from both industry and construction. What measures could be taken to prevent this?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
318 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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