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coal industry

coal industry JoQ50
While the passage provide solutions to reduce the pollution caused by coal industry, the lecturer discloses information that suggests that the solutions provided in the passage are not worthy enough implementing. Firstly, combustion of coal is a major contributor of carbon dioxide in the atmosphere. There are two ways of burning coal - electric combustion and combustion with the help of natural gas. Though the usage of natural gas to burn coal produces lesser carbon dioxide, large amounts of solid wastes are produced which can contribute to polluting the environment. Thus, improving the reaction efficiency to reduce the pollution as mentioned in the passage is not an effective solution. Secondly, though flushing the coal with water in order to remove sulfides prevents the formation of sulfur dioxide in the air, the washed out sulfides are diverted into water bodies which will result in the formation of H2SO2. This compound is acidic in nature and will acidify the ambient ecosystem. Thus, flushing the coal with water as recommended in the passage will result in a different form of pollution, there by making this practice futile. Finally, there are no technologically advanced techniques to collect the emitted carbon dioxide presently. Moreover, it is very costly to develop such technology and even if developed, the captured carbon dioxide has to be discarded somewhere. Ultimately, the discarded carbon dioxide will find its way back into the environment. Thus, in contrast to what has been stated in the passage regarding collection of emitted carbon dioxide, this method is not feasible.
While the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passage
provide solutions to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the pollution caused by coal industry, the lecturer discloses information that suggests that the solutions provided in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passage
are not worthy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
implementing.

Firstly
, combustion of coal is a major contributor of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
carbon
dioxide in the atmosphere. There are two ways of burning coal
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
-
electric combustion and combustion with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of natural gas. Though the usage of natural gas to burn coal produces lesser
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
carbon
dioxide, large amounts of solid wastes
are produced
which can contribute to polluting the environment.
Thus
, improving the reaction efficiency to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the pollution as mentioned in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passage
is not an effective solution.

Secondly
, though flushing the coal with water in order to remove sulfides
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevents
the formation of sulfur dioxide in the air, the washed out sulfides
are diverted
into water bodies which will result in the formation of H2SO2. This compound is acidic in nature and will acidify the ambient ecosystem.
Thus
, flushing the coal with water as recommended in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passage
will result in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
form of pollution, there by making this practice futile.

Finally
, there are no
technologically
advanced techniques to collect the emitted
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
carbon
dioxide
presently
.
Moreover
, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
costly to develop such technology and even if developed, the captured
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
carbon
dioxide
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
be discarded
somewhere.
Ultimately
, the discarded
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
carbon
dioxide will find its way back into the environment.
Thus
,
in contrast
to what has
been stated
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passage
regarding collection of emitted
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
carbon
dioxide, this method is not feasible.
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IELTS essay coal industry

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
255 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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