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City planners’ new designs include setting up schools, markets and commercial places (like offices) in different areas of the city. Do you think it will help the city dwellers?

City planners’ new designs include setting up schools, markets and commercial places (like offices) in different areas of the city. Do you think it will help the city dwellers? 3nwn
It is considered that now days the city planners making new design for the cities in which the educational institutions, shopping sites and commercial places will be allotted different places in the city. In my opinion, it will help people those are living in cities. The primary reason is that if the cities will be designed properly and space provided according to the type of work then it will help to reduce the congestion in the cities due to which many major cities in the world are suffering. If the schools will be at their right place, then students can easily focus on their studies without facing any outer disturbance. Whereas, if all the premises of different purposes will be built at same place, then it will make the whole place very unorganized and it will get more difficult for people to find address of the right place. Moreover, if the space distribution of the city will be unequal and this will be the main hindrance to develop all parts of the city in order to make it smarter. People will live in small apartments or house with narrow streets. It will be very difficult re-structure the whole city again because till that time lot of investment already was done by many people set up their businesses or houses. In conclusion, it is better to set up a proper design for the cities so that everything should be placed at right area this way the space distribution will be equally allocated, whereas this way there will be less congestion in cities.
It
is considered
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
days the city planners making new design for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
in which the educational institutions, shopping sites and commercial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
will
be allotted
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
in the city. In my opinion, it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
those are living in cities.

The primary reason is that if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
will
be designed
properly
and space provided according to the type of work then it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the congestion in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
due to which
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
major
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
in the world are suffering. If the schools will be at their right
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
, then students can
easily
focus on their studies without facing any outer disturbance. Whereas, if all the premises of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
purposes will
be built
at same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
, then it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the whole
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
unorganized and it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more difficult for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to find address of the right place.

Moreover
, if the space distribution of the city will be unequal and this will be the main hindrance to develop all parts of the city in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it smarter.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
apartments or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
with narrow streets. It will be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
difficult re-structure the whole city again
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
till that time lot of investment already
was done
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
set up their businesses or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
.

In conclusion
, it is better to set up a proper design for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that everything should
be placed
at right area this way the space distribution will be
equally
allocated, whereas this way there will be less congestion in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
.

IELTS essay City planners’ new designs include setting up schools, markets and commercial places (like offices) in different areas of the city. Do you think it will help the city dwellers?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
261 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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