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Cinema, music, and sports idols are role models for youngsters. Do you agree or disagree?

Cinema, music, and sports idols are role models for youngsters. e5wVK
The topic of cinemas, music, and sports idols are role models for youngsters has become a heated debate among societies. Although many people assert that they have only bad impact on youngsters, while others refute this proposition saying that children can get motivation from them. This essay will discuss the role of celebrities in children life and reach a logical conclusion. There are many arguments which ascertain why youngsters should follow their role models in which the most preponderant one is that juveniles will excel their interpersonal abilities and increase confidence just by seeing their actions. They try to copy their fashion and style thereby resulting in gaining confidence and skills. For example, a study showed that students who follow their idols are more successful in their future life than their counter peers. Thus, media persons play an important role in making youth life better. Another pivotal aspect of the argument would that following their role models will help in gaining a better career. They would have more public relations thereby will have fruitful future. For instance, a survey revealed that about 80% of the good employees were those who always look for their role models. Hence, this is the reason why many people agree to this fact. In conclusion, this essay discussed the role of role models for youngsters in terms of getting jobs and gaining confidence. Therefore, in my opinion, youngsters should always follow the foot steps of their idols in order to succeed.
The topic of cinemas, music, and sports idols are
role
models
for youngsters has become a heated debate among societies. Although
many
people
assert that they have
only
bad
impact on youngsters, while others refute this proposition saying that children can
get
motivation from them. This essay will discuss the
role
of celebrities in children life and reach a logical conclusion.

There are
many
arguments which ascertain why youngsters should follow their
role
models
in which the most preponderant one is that juveniles will excel their interpersonal abilities and increase confidence
just
by seeing their actions. They try to copy their fashion and style thereby resulting in gaining confidence and
skills
.
For example
, a study
showed
that students who follow their idols are more successful in their future life than their counter peers.
Thus
, media persons play an
important
role
in making youth life better.

Another pivotal aspect of the argument would that following their
role
models
will
help
in gaining a better career. They would have more public relations thereby will have fruitful future.
For instance
, a survey revealed that about 80% of the
good
employees were those who always look for their
role
models
.
Hence
, this is the reason why
many
people
agree
to this fact.

In conclusion
, this essay discussed the
role
of
role
models
for youngsters in terms of getting jobs and gaining confidence.
Therefore
, in my opinion, youngsters should always follow the foot steps of their idols in order to succeed.
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IELTS essay Cinema, music, and sports idols are role models for youngsters.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
246 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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