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Children ore facing more pressures nowadays from acaedemic, social, and commercial, perspectives. What are the causes of these pressuresand what masures should be taken to reduce lhese pressures? v.2

Children ore facing more pressures nowadays from acaedemic, social, and commercial, perspectives. What are the causes of these pressuresand what masures should be taken to reduce lhese pressures? v. 2
It is commonly said that today' s children are pressurized and are facing harder and harder academic, social and commercial challenges. This essay intends to discuss the causes of these pressures and suggest some measures to alleviate the problem. I believe that children must be shielded from such mounting pressures. There are many academic pressures on children. Today' s child is not competing with the child next door, or even of one' s town or country. He is competing with the child of the globalvillage. The big planet Earth of yesteryears is a small well-linked global village of today. Parents want their children to excel in every field. They send their children to the best schools, where the school bag is often heavier than the child himself. Even after school hours there are private tuitions. Children don' t have time to bloom and bring out their hidden talents. There are also many social and commercial pressures. Socially, the children of today are in a huge dilemma' They want to adopt the global culture, whereas their parents force them to confine themselves to the traditions. This sometimes makes them rebel against the rules laid by their elders. Then, they also face peer pressure, which can be good if their peers are good, and bad if their peers are not disciplined. This peer pressure coupled with the consumerist society of today can lead to a lot of stress and strain on children. They see the latest models of cell phones and other items with their peers and want to buy them. When they are unable to do so, they get stressed. The solutions are not simple. Children have to be handled with great care. Parents should have realistic expectations from their children. They should have a pro-active approach and give time to their children. The biggest onus is on the schools and teachers. They should strive to bring out the best in every child and competition and co-operation should both be taught simultaneously. The aim of competition should not be to win at all cost. Children have to be taught to win with modesty and lose with grace. To summarise, there is no doubt that the children of today are facing so many pressures, but steps should be taken on a war footing to protect their innocent childhood. Otherwise, these pressures will stifle the physical and psychological growth of children.
It is
commonly
said that
today&
#039; s
children
are pressurized
and are facing harder and harder academic, social

and
commercial challenges. This essay intends to discuss the causes of these
pressures
and suggest
some


measures
to alleviate the problem. I believe that
children
must
be shielded
from such mounting pressures.

There are
many
academic
pressures
on
children
.
Today&
#039; s
child
is not competing with the
child
next
door,
or


even
of
one&
#039; s town or country. He is competing with the
child
of the
globalvillage
. The
big
planet Earth
of


yesteryears
is a
small
well-linked global village of
today
. Parents want their
children
to excel in every field.

They
send
their
children
to the best
schools
, where the
school
bag is
often
heavier than the
child
himself.

Even after
school
hours there are private
tuitions
.
Children
don&
#039; t have time to bloom and bring out
their


hidden
talents.

There are
also
many
social and commercial
pressures
.
Socially
, the
children
of
today
are in a huge
dilemma&
#039;

They want to adopt the global culture, whereas their parents force them to confine themselves to the

traditions
. This
sometimes
makes
them rebel against the
rules
laid by their elders. Then, they
also
face peer

pressure
, which can be
good
if their peers are
good
, and
bad
if their peers are not disciplined. This
peer


pressure
coupled with the consumerist society of
today
can lead to
a lot of
stress
and strain on children.

They
see
the latest models of cell phones and other items with their peers and want to
buy
them. When

they
are unable to do
so
, they
get
stressed
.

The solutions are not simple.
Children
have to
be handled
with great care. Parents should have
realistic


expectations
from their
children
. They should have a pro-active approach and give time to their children.

The biggest onus is on the
schools
and teachers. They should strive to bring out the best in every
child
and


competition
and co-operation should both
be taught
simultaneously
. The aim of competition should not
be


to
win at all cost.
Children
have to
be taught
to win with modesty and lose with grace.

To
summarise
, there is no doubt that the
children
of
today
are facing
so
many
pressures
,
but
steps should

be
taken on a war footing to protect their innocent childhood.
Otherwise
, these
pressures
will stifle the

physical
and psychological growth of
children
.
1Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
32Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
31Mistakes
If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his own language, that goes to his heart.
Nelson Mandela

IELTS essay Children ore facing more pressures nowadays from acaedemic, social, and commercial, perspectives. What are the causes of these pressuresand what masures should be taken to reduce lhese pressures? v. 2

Essay
  American English
24 paragraphs
398 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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