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Children are happier than adults

Children are happier than adults Ajap3
everyone has their own definition of considering himself happy. however, every adult find a child more happy than he is. personally, I believe children are actually more elated with their lives. I feel this way for 2 reasons, which I will explore in the following essay. To begin with, grown ups forecast shadow on their smooth going life by always worrying and having a desire of collecting more things. however, a child just cherish the moment he is living and gets happy with very ordinary things, playing with ball can bring immense pleasure to him. For example, my younger brother who is just four years old loves playing. he is so fond of playing that he can start to enjoy within himself by playing with his fingers all alone. this made me wonder that how he enjoys his current time and doesn't care about anything, like he does not demand of any toys and just loves playing with his fingers. On the other hand, me as a grown up always want new things to play as I get very easily bored and feels sad when my demand to buy new toys are not fulfilled. Therefore, child just enjoys his current moment whereas adults always think about getting more and more which results in over thinking and lack of cherishing. Secondly, another thing which perturbs and snatches all the joy of life from adult's life is the responsibility he need to fulfill. As an adult one has to play very different roles from being a responsible son, a responsible employee and what not. All this roles demand hard work and make an adult worried if he fails in any of the role. however, a younger person have no such responsibilities, he just need to go to school study well and play. my personal experience is a compelling example of this. about ten years ago, when I was a kid I still remember life was so easy to live at that time. I go to school in the morning and returning back to home in afternoon and after doing my homework, I am free to play for as long as I want to. if any thing which disturbed me was that what game to I should play. On the other hand, now being an adult life has become not an easy thing to cherish. I need to take care of everyone in my family and have the burden of fulfilling the expectations of my family, of my boss, my friends etc. living with all the burden is not a child's play and requires efforts, which takes away the moments of enjoying life and be happy as I was previously when I was a kid. In conclusion, I am of the opinion that children enjoy the life more than an adult. this is because a child is busy enjoying his current moment and is way from the materialistic mindset and because a child does not have to bear the burden of responsibilities.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
everyone
has their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
definition of considering himself
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happy
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
however
, every adult find a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happy
than he is.
personally
, I believe children are actually more elated with their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. I feel this way for 2 reasons, which I will explore in the following essay.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
grown ups
forecast shadow on their smooth going
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
by always worrying and having a desire of collecting more things.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
however
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
cherish the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
moment
he is living and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happy
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
ordinary things,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
with ball can bring immense pleasure to him.
For example
, my younger brother who is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
four years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loves
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
he
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
fond of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
that he can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
enjoy
within himself by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
with his fingers all alone.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
this
made me wonder that how he
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
enjoys
his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
time and doesn't care about anything, like he does not demand of any toys and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loves
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
with his fingers.
On the other hand
, me as a grown up always want new things to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
as I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
easily
bored and feels sad when my demand to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
new toys are not fulfilled.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
enjoys
his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
moment
whereas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
adults
always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
about getting more and more which results in over thinking and lack of cherishing.

Secondly
, another thing which perturbs and snatches all the joy of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
from adult's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
is the responsibility he need to fulfill. As an adult one
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
roles from being a responsible son, a responsible employee and what not. All
Did you mean "these"?
this
roles demand
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
work and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
an adult worried if he fails in any of the role.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
however
, a younger person have no such responsibilities, he
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
need to go to school study well and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
my
personal experience is a compelling example of this.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
about
ten years ago, when I was a kid I
still
remember
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
easy to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
at that time. I go to school in the morning and
Consider using "returning".
returning back
to home in afternoon and after doing my homework, I am free to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
for as long as I want to. if
Did you mean "anything"?
any thing
which disturbed me was that what game to I should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
.
On the other hand
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
being an adult
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
has become not an easy thing to cherish. I need to take care of everyone in my family and have the burden of fulfilling the expectations of my family, of my boss, my friends etc. living with all the burden is not a child's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
and requires efforts, which takes away the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
moments
of enjoying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happy
as I was previously when I was a kid.

In conclusion
, I am of the opinion that children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
enjoy
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
more than an adult.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
this
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
is busy enjoying his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
moment
and is way from the materialistic mindset and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
does not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
bear the burden of responsibilities.
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IELTS essay Children are happier than adults

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
499 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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