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children are facing more pressures nowadays from academic, social and commercial perspectives. What are the causes of these pressures and what measures should be taken to reduce these pressures?

Argumenting, burdon on children turn out to be a great concern among youngsters. In today's Era pupils are facing a high proportion of burden from their institutes, social and from business perspectives. There are numerous number of causes for this reason whilst myriad of remedial measures are there to solve the same. Shedding light on the prominent reason due to children facing pressure from academic, social and commercial prospective. First cause from academic institutes, more homework given by tutors onto this student mind gets disturbed by doing more and more work from home, it leads to distruction from blood relations. It is a survey from researchers that individual have to do study nearly 6 hours in a day otherwise their mind gets disturbed. Secondly, the main cause of socially burden is peer pressure due to this if one youngsters stand on first position in any field than other gets disturbed why he is not able to do this? Although, parents pressure, some progenerators pressurise to their children to stand first in a class, if they not, they even angry on them, its turn out to be a reason of depression among children. Despite from this, few peoples are also in the pressure because of their future business setups, it is the initial reason for study. On the other side of mirror, there are a colossal of solutions such as family sport, it is the upmost solution if offsprings have a good family relations, those always a sport their infants even they fail or pass. Consequently, they will ever get success in life. Moreover, relax mind is must, they have to think each and everything with free mind and they must have a good Peer relations, those always stimulate to their friend towards success. By doing all these is certainly, all the worries will permanently removed from life. To recapitulate, having analysed the whole scenario, it can be concluded that the issue is a serious unsurmountable and can still be alliviated with some efforts of individuals.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Argumenting
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
burdon
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
turn out to be a great concern among youngsters. In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's Era pupils are facing a high proportion of burden from their institutes, social and from business perspectives. There are
It seems that an article is missing. Did you mean “a numerous number of”?
numerous number of
causes for this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
whilst myriad of remedial measures are there to solve the same.

Shedding light on the prominent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
due to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
facing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
from academic, social and commercial prospective.
First
cause from academic institutes, more homework
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
by tutors onto this student
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mind
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gets
disturbed by doing more and more work from home, it leads to
Possible spelling mistake found.
distruction
from blood relations. It is a survey from researchers that individual
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
do study
nearly
6 hours in a day
otherwise
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mind
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gets
disturbed.
Secondly
, the main cause of
socially
burden is peer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
due to this if one
The plural noun “youngsters” doesn’t fit after the quantifier “one”. A possessive apostrophe may be missing, or you meant the singular form.
youngsters
stand on
first
position in any field than other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gets
disturbed why he is not able to do this? Although, parents
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Possible spelling mistake found.
progenerators
Possible spelling mistake. ‘pressurise’ is British English.
pressurise
to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to stand
first
in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
, if they not, they even angry on them, its turn out to be a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
of depression among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. Despite from this, few peoples are
also
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of their future business setups, it is the initial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
for study.

On the other side of mirror, there are a
The phrase ‘a colossal of’ is not correct. Use a noun, not an adjective, between ‘a’ and ‘of’.
colossal
of solutions such as family sport, it is the upmost solution if offsprings have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
family relations, those always a sport their infants even they fail or pass.
Consequently
, they will ever
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
get
success in life.
Moreover
, relax
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mind
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
each and everything with free
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
mind and
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
Peer relations, those always stimulate to their friend towards success. By doing all
The verb ‘is’ is singular. Did you mean: “This is” or “these are”?
these is
certainly
, all the worries will
permanently
removed from life.

To recapitulate, having
Possible spelling mistake. ‘analysed’ is British English.
analysed
the whole scenario, it can
be concluded
that the issue is a serious unsurmountable and can
still
be
Possible spelling mistake found.
alliviated
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
efforts of individuals.
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IELTS essay children are facing more pressures nowadays from academic, social and commercial perspectives. What are the causes of these pressures and what measures should be taken to reduce these pressures?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
335 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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