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Celebrity status no longer equates with talent/accomplishments. Discuss both the views and give your opinion.

Celebrity status no longer equates with talent/accomplishments. My1mk
It is undeniable that with the commencement of current century, there have been a host of debutants in film industry nevertheless not everyone can reach the pinnacle. Certain aspirants triumph the journey to limitless success whilst others are not even able to stretch their legs to finishing line. Arguments prevail regarding the co-relation between the celebrity status and the achievements which are vividly elaborated in the forthcoming paragraphs. To commence, celebrity status is no longer intrinsic with talent or skill according to the ongoing trend in media. Social media has mammoth power to forge a superstar overnight. Additionally, nepotism can be considerably taken as a causative factor to stimulate the entrance of celebrity children into the limelight. This can be witnessed appreciably in Bollywood particularly in the case of Alia Bhatt, Varun Dhawan, and Ranbir Kapoor. On top of it, many owing to their inappropriate and irrespective deeds accumulate publicity among everyone. A tangible illustration can be of an Indian cricketer Hardik Pandya who attained noticeable public attention due to his inappropriate comments in a chat show. Contrastingly, in an abundant of sectors, talent is not replaceable and uncompromising. Not all without talent can dive into the pool of becoming celebrity. In certain cases, it demands extreme level of perseverance to achieving the goals thereby gaining public attention. Peculiarly in education and Ltd sports, one has to continuously strive to attain their predetermined goals. To exemplify, Tushar Kapoor- the son of famous Indian retro actor Jitendra could not mark his presence in Bollywood nonetheless having the support of his family background. In compendium, with regards to the discussion in the aforesaid paragraphs, I reiterate that nowadays skills and achievements are not the only criteria responsible for gaining fame however many others have to rigorously strive to create their name value.
It is undeniable that with the commencement of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
century, there have been a host of debutants in film industry
nevertheless
not everyone can reach the pinnacle. Certain aspirants triumph the journey to limitless success whilst others are not even able to stretch their legs to finishing line. Arguments prevail regarding the co-relation between the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrity
status and the achievements which are
vividly
elaborated in the forthcoming paragraphs.

To commence,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrity
status is no longer intrinsic with talent or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
according to the ongoing trend in media. Social media has mammoth power to forge a superstar overnight.
Additionally
, nepotism can be
considerably
taken as a causative factor to stimulate the entrance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrity
children into the limelight. This can
be witnessed
appreciably
in Bollywood
particularly
in the case of
Possible spelling mistake found.
Alia
Possible spelling mistake found.
Bhatt
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Varun
Possible spelling mistake found.
Dhawan
, and
Possible spelling mistake found.
Ranbir
Possible spelling mistake found.
Kapoor
. On top of it,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
owing to their inappropriate and irrespective deeds accumulate publicity among everyone. A tangible illustration can be of an Indian cricketer
Possible spelling mistake found.
Hardik
Possible spelling mistake found.
Pandya
who attained noticeable public attention due to his inappropriate comments in a chat
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
.

Possible spelling mistake found.
Contrastingly
, in
The phrase 'an abundant of' is not correct. Use a noun, not an adjective, between 'an' and 'of'.
an abundant of
sectors, talent is not replaceable and uncompromising. Not all without talent can dive into the pool of becoming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrity
. In certain cases, it demands extreme level of perseverance to achieving the goals thereby gaining public attention.
Peculiarly
in education and Ltd sports, one
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
continuously
strive to attain their predetermined goals. To exemplify,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Tushar
Possible spelling mistake found.
Kapoor
- the son of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
Indian retro actor
Possible spelling mistake found.
Jitendra
could not mark his presence in Bollywood nonetheless having the support of his family background.

In compendium,
Use "in regard to", "with regard to", or more simply "regarding".
with regards to
the discussion in the aforesaid paragraphs, I reiterate that nowadays
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and achievements are not the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
criteria responsible for gaining fame
however
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
others
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
rigorously
strive to create their name value.
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IELTS essay Celebrity status no longer equates with talent/accomplishments.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
300 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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