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can video gamers couted as true athleters ?

can video gamers couted as true athleters? mWVxd
Video gamers can count as true athletes. While the players who play video games spend every day mastering their skills in every round, the athletes improve their physical body by playing sports. Creating a good schedule and healthy diet, that also help the sports players makes their life better. Many people disagree that video games for fun and waste time. Although many opposite viewpoints, but video gamers spend most of their life to improve their skills. However, it improves their skills and strategies to win the game competitors. This essay will examine why video gamers can compare as same as athletesFirstly, video players spend a long time improving their skills as athletes. Video gamers need to learn ways to play games effectively, whereas the athletes have at least once or twice of training practices to play sports successfully. The gamers need to have at least two years to be masters of games. Because each game will have a competition board for every player to look at their level skills are improve or not. If game players want to be the winners in every week of the competition board, they will need to add up their level skills by working hard and improving their strategies. For instance, Tri, who is one of the famous gamers in VietNam, Tri has been improving his skills for three years. He had the amount of knowledge and skills when he lost many rounds of games. Both video gamers and athletes have to work hard to be masters of their fields. As a result, video gamers have to improve their skills in many years as the athletes need to train in the same way. Secondly, video gamers can connect people as athletes do with teamwork skills. Teamwork skills are important because it makes people can be close together, and it is the necessary skills to develop the ability in the future. While video players can play a game with their members, the members in their teams can help increase the level in games. They can also fix problems for their teammates, and their teammates can look back on the issues, that they don't know where to fix so they can learn from their own mistakes. for example, Thai plays games with his teammates during a break in every summer, and he can help his friends can understand the problems when they can't defend the monsters. Furthermore, they can improve their level skills, so they can win when they play this game next time. As a result, the athletes need teamwork to be a success as same as the gamers do. In conclusion, video gamers can count as athletes. Because both video gamers and athletes need support from teamwork. Strategies and working hard are important for video gamers as athletes do. Without these things, video gamers and athletes can't be successful.
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Video
gamers can count as true
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
athletes
. While the
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players
who
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play
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
spend every day mastering their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
in every round, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
athletes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improve
their physical body by playing sports. Creating a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
schedule and healthy diet, that
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the sports
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players
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
their life better.
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Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
disagree that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
for fun and waste time. Although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
opposite viewpoints,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
video
gamers spend most of their life to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improve
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
.
However
, it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improves
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
and strategies to win the game competitors. This essay will examine why
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video
gamers can compare as same as
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athletesFirstly
,
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video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
players
spend a long time improving their
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skills
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
athletes
.
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Video
gamers
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need
to learn ways to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
effectively
, whereas the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
athletes
have at least once or twice of training practices to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
sports
successfully
. The gamers
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to have at least two years to be masters of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
each game will have a competition board for every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
player
to look at their
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level
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
are
Consider using a past participle here: "improved".
improve
or not. If game
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players
want to be the winners in every week of the competition board, they will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
up their
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level
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skills
by working
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
and improving their strategies.
For instance
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Tri
, who is one of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
gamers in
Possible spelling mistake found.
VietNam
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Tri
has been improving his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
for three years. He had the amount of knowledge and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
when he lost
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
rounds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
. Both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
video
gamers and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
athletes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to be masters of their fields.
As a result
,
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video
gamers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improve
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
years as the
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athletes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to train
in the same way
.
Secondly
,
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video
gamers can connect
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
athletes
do with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teamwork
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Teamwork
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
are
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important
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can be close together, and it is the necessary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
to develop the ability in the future. While
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
players
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
a game with their members, the members in their teams can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
increase the
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level
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
. They can
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fix
problems for their teammates, and their teammates can look back on the issues, that they don't know where to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fix
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they can learn from their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
mistakes.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
for
example, Thai
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plays
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
with his teammates during a break in every summer, and he can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
his friends can understand the problems when they can't defend the monsters.
Furthermore
, they can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improve
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
level
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they can win when they
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play
this game
next
time.
As a result
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
athletes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teamwork
to be a success as same as the gamers do.
In conclusion
,
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video
gamers can count as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
athletes
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
video
gamers and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
athletes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
support from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teamwork
. Strategies and working
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
video
gamers as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
athletes
do. Without these things,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
video
gamers and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
athletes
can't be successful.
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IELTS essay can video gamers couted as true athleters?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
474 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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