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Brick manufacturing process

Brick manufacturing process qV6Vp
Today computers and its technology have become an indispensable tool in our routine life. In fact, we find it extremely difficult to get through a working day without using them and their applications. This point is out that in future, there shall be even more usage of computer technology; however, as per my opinion, this dependency may have some negative influence too. Both, the future uses and my view and discussed further. Referring to futuristic uses, the foremost application would be to create even more sophisticated computers. They shall be working in all possible areas of life and work where artificial intelligence is needed. For instance, computer technology shall be employed for virtual tours to various destinations, DNA testing and to have super security at work and at home. Besides this, such a technologies shall be used extensively for household chores. It is predicted that domestic robots and computer systems shall manage the regular cooking, cleaning and even reminding the masters what groceries are to be bought! At schools also there would be a teacher less classes or more likely, the concept of real school may disappear. It is predicted that there would be virtual teaching techniques and outline education all over. Considering the second question, as mentioned, I surely believe that depending on computer technology can show some serious effects. To begin with, professionals would be working in a less formal setup due to computers. This can damage the work culture and skills of the communication and being competitive. There may be a severe lack of creative ideas amongst people. At school, as there shall be no real classroom sessions, the future students may not experience the student teacher interaction, gathering peripheral knowledge while studying and almost no chance to meet different personalities. On the other hand, at home too, the art of traditional cooking and family time can vanish. To cap it all, with less physical activities may health issues may arise and people would become lazy. Thus, to conclude, it can be said that computer technology is a boon for the mankind now I can become more useful in future; however, sincerely attention must be given that mankind should not become the slave of it and lose his health, happiness and creativity.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
computers and its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
an indispensable tool in our routine

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life
. In fact, we find it
extremely
difficult to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
through a working day without using them
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
and


This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
their
applications. This point is out that in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
, there shall be even more usage of
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
computer


technology;
however
, as per my opinion, this dependency may have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
influence

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
too
. Both, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
uses
and my view and discussed
further
.

Referring to futuristic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
uses
, the foremost application would be to create even more

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
sophisticated
computers. They shall be working in all possible areas of life and work
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
where


This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
artificial
intelligence
is needed
.
For instance
, computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
shall
be employed
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
for


virtual tours to various destinations, DNA testing and to have super security at work and at

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
home
.
Besides
this, such a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
shall be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
extensively
for household chores. It
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
is


predicted that domestic robots and computer systems shall manage the regular cooking,

cleaning and even reminding the masters what groceries are to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
! At schools
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
also


This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
there
would be a teacher less classes or more likely, the concept of real school may disappear.

It
is predicted
that there would be virtual teaching techniques and outline education all over.

Considering the second question, as mentioned, I
surely
believe that depending on

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
serious effects. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, professionals would
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
be


This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
working
in a less formal setup due to computers. This can damage the work culture and
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
skills


This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
of
the communication and being competitive. There may be a severe lack of creative
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
ideas


This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
amongst
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
. At school, as there shall be no real classroom sessions, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
students


may not experience the student teacher interaction, gathering peripheral knowledge while

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
studying
and almost no chance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
personalities.
On the other hand
, at
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
home


This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
too
, the art of traditional cooking and family time can vanish. To cap it all, with less
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
physical


This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
activities
The word 'health' is a noun or an adjective. A verb is missing or misspelled, or maybe a comma is missing.
may health
issues may arise and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
would
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
lazy.

Thus
,
to conclude
, it can
be said
that computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
is a boon for the mankind

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
I can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
more useful in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
;
however
,
sincerely
attention
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
that

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
mankind
should not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
the slave of it and lose his health, happiness and creativity.
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IELTS essay Brick manufacturing process

Essay
  American English
26 paragraphs
375 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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