Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages? epyO
Nowadays, the population of some countries includes a large number of young adults compared with the older people. Even this fact could have both advantage and disadvantages, in my opinion, there are certain factors that we need to outweigh and I would like to discuss the outcome and drawbacks between the two. On one hand, having more younger generations in countries can give you advantages when it comes to manpower, they are more active and socialize. Like for Example most early adults are healthier people they can work more efficiently and faster, because of that they can contribute to the country and help to boost the economy. Secondly, Young adults has always fresh ideas and do the task with all of their ability. However, the outback of these, there are some younger adults who decide easily and do whatever they want to do without having any thoughts which is not a moral thing. On the other hand, Older population are more educated and gained a lot of experiences throughout their life which is essential. For instances to become a specialist physician it is needed at least 15 years to get a degree and sometimes it may delay more and because of that, older adults forgot the further things around him and focus on their profession until they got old. Nevertheless, people after their 50’s may not be able to do a task with their full ability unlike young adults which are more physically fit. And in addition, with that, young generations are likely to commit a crime because of their age and than older people who just want to live a peaceful life. To conclude the arguments given above, I firmly believe that the advantages younger populations than older people outweigh the outcome and drawback between the two.
Nowadays, the population of
some
countries includes
a large number of
young
adults
compared with the
older
people
. Even this fact could have both advantage and disadvantages, in my opinion, there are certain factors that we need to outweigh and I would like to discuss the outcome and drawbacks between the two.

On one hand, having
more younger
generations in countries can give you advantages when it
comes
to manpower, they are more active and socialize. Like
for Example
most early
adults
are healthier
people
they can work more
efficiently
and faster,
because
of that they can contribute to the country and
help
to boost the economy.
Secondly
,
Young
adults
has always fresh
ideas
and do the task with all of their ability.
However
, the outback of these, there are
some
younger
adults
who decide
easily
and do whatever they want to do without having any thoughts which is not a moral thing.

On the other hand
,
Older
population are more educated and gained
a lot of
experiences throughout their life which is essential. For instances to become a specialist physician it
is needed
at least 15 years to
get
a degree and
sometimes
it may delay more and
because
of that,
older
adults
forgot the
further
things around him and focus on their profession until they
got
old
.
Nevertheless
,
people
after their
50’s
may not be able to do a task with their full ability unlike
young
adults
which are more
physically
fit. And
in addition
, with that,
young
generations are likely to commit a crime
because
of their age and
than
older
people
who
just
want to
live
a peaceful life.

To conclude
the arguments
given
above, I
firmly
believe that the advantages younger populations than
older
people
outweigh the outcome and drawback between the two.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
298 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts