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At school, children should either be taught to compete or to cooperate. Which form of education do you think would best benefit society? Describe both sides of the argument and explain your own opinion.

At school, children should either be taught to compete or to cooperate. Which form of education do you think would best benefit society? Describe both sides of the argument and explain your own opinion. 2bK9b
Educational methods vary around the world. In some countries, competition is considered more important, while in other countries, cooperation is viewed as a more essential skill. In my opinion, both cooperation and competition are vital components of a complete education. Competitiveness is an attribute that is encouraged in many cultures, and it can be useful in many ways. Firstly, a child that learns how to compete and succeed will have advantages over the child who shies away from competition. For example, the child that has competitive drive and works hard to excel will create opportunities for himself or herself, and will be better equipped to handle challenges and find solutions. Healthy competition can benefit society by encouraging individuals to work hard, strive and succeed. On the other hand, cooperation is also an essential skill. Members of society must be able to cooperate in order to create successful, peaceful communities. If individuals work only competitively, without cooperating, then society will become fragmented. A good example to illustrate this point is a sports team; if one individual strives alone to succeed, his or her task will be more difficult. But if the team works together towards a common goal through cooperation, their chances of winning are better. For these reasons, cooperation should be taught in schools to create strong communities and a cooperative society. Therefore, it is my opinion that cooperation and competition are both essential elements of education and should both be taught in schools. If education is approached from both angles, a child might be taught to strive and succeed, but also to help those around him or her to do the same, therefore benefiting society by instilling both a sense of personal satisfaction but also of helpfulness. In conclusion, cooperation and competition, when taught together to young people, will create a future generation of successful and considerate citizens.
Educational methods vary around the world. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
countries,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
competition
is considered
more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
, while in other countries,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cooperation
is viewed
as a more essential
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
. In my opinion, both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cooperation
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
competition
are vital components
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
of


This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
a
complete education.

Competitiveness is an attribute that
is encouraged
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
cultures, and it can be useful in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways.
Firstly
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
that learns how to compete and succeed will have advantages over the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
who shies away from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
competition
.
For example
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
that has competitive drive and works
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to excel will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
create
opportunities for himself or herself, and will be better equipped to handle challenges and find solutions. Healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
competition
can benefit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
by encouraging individuals to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
, strive and succeed.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cooperation
is
also
an essential
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
. Members of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be able to cooperate in order to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
create
successful, peaceful communities. If individuals
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
competitively
, without cooperating, then
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
will become fragmented. A
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
example to illustrate this point is a sports team; if one individual strives alone to succeed,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
his or her
task will be more difficult.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
if the team works together towards a common goal through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cooperation
, their chances of winning are better. For these reasons,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cooperation
should
be taught
in schools to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
create
strong communities and a cooperative society.

Therefore
, it is my opinion that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cooperation
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
competition
are both essential elements of education and should both
be taught
in schools. If education
is approached
from both angles, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
might
be taught
to strive and succeed,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
those around him or her to do the same,
therefore
benefiting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
by instilling both a sense of personal satisfaction
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
of helpfulness.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cooperation
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
competition
, when taught together to young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
create
a future generation of successful and considerate citizens.
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IELTS essay At school, children should either be taught to compete or to cooperate. Which form of education do you think would best benefit society? Describe both sides of the argument and explain your own opinion.

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
309 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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