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As mass communication and transport continue to grow , societies are becoming more and more alike leading to a phenomenon known as globalization will inevitably leads to the total loss of cultural identity. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement

As mass communication and transport continue to grow, societies are becoming more and more alike leading to a phenomenon known as globalization will inevitably leads to the total loss of cultural identity. with this statement G73m
With the advancement in communication and transportation system, world is becoming a global village and people are altering their way of living and celebrating traditional festivals. Due to such development some individuals are wondering that, it will completely change our traditions or vanishing it. Although it changes our lifestyle, yet it is not going to ruin it effectively. To begin with, nowadays it is very easy for anyone to visit and comunicate with people from different cultures and piece of land which means they can get to know about various cultures through the development of globalisation. This is the reason behind people are celebrating the western festival and follow their clothing styles, which somewhere effect the values of traditional clothes, cousine and cultural events of some areas.
With the advancement in communication and transportation system, world is becoming a global village and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are altering their way of living and celebrating traditional festivals. Due to such development
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
individuals are wondering that, it will completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
our traditions or vanishing it. Although it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
our lifestyle,
yet
it is not going to ruin it
effectively
.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, nowadays it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
easy for anyone to visit and
Possible spelling mistake found.
comunicate
with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
cultures and piece of land which means they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to know about various cultures through the development of
Possible spelling mistake. 'globalisation' is British English.
globalisation
. This is the reason behind
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are celebrating the western festival and follow their clothing styles, which somewhere effect the values of traditional clothes,
Possible spelling mistake found.
cousine
and cultural
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
areas.

IELTS essay As mass communication and transport continue to grow, societies are becoming more and more alike leading to a phenomenon known as globalization will inevitably leads to the total loss of cultural identity. with this statement

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
127 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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