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Are single-sex schools more effective than co-ed schools?

Are single-sex schools more effective than co-ed schools? Ymk7V
In many countries, when the children grow up and should go to school, one of the important problems of parents has been revealed. This problem is selecting of the proper school which has a perfect education system. Also, there is another concern which is related to the type of school that is single-sex or co-ed. Fortunately, in Iran, parents do not have this concern and all schools are single-sex. There are different opinions about the effectivity of the type of school. If we see the school as a place that the students must learn new things and educate well, I prefer single-sex. The reason of this agreement directly related to the personality of the children which is completely different between boys and girls. Some researches have shown, when both of gender present in a class, the concentration of the students has been decreased and they could not learn the lesson well. So, in mixed school. It is possible that the efficiency of the education may be less than single-sex. In contrary, if we look at the school as a piece of the society then we expect the student learn everything that needs for the social life. According this view, co-ed school is better than other. When both gender study together, there is a chance for each of them to know the needs of the opposite gender and learn how to treat with them. Therefore, this type of school can help people in thier future life. Thus, both of school type have positive and negative features. So, we cannot absolutely say which one is the best. The selection of good school for children directly related the parents point of view and also the society.
In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries, when the children grow up and should go to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
, one of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
problems of parents has
been revealed
. This problem is selecting of the proper
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
which has a perfect education system.
Also
, there is another concern which
is related
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
type
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
that is
single-sex or co-ed.
Fortunately
, in Iran, parents do not have this concern and all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
are single-sex.

There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
opinions about the effectivity of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
type
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
. If we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
as a place that the students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
new things and educate well, I prefer single-sex. The reason of this agreement
directly
related to the personality of the children which is completely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
between boys and girls.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
researches have shown, when both of gender present in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
, the concentration of the students has been
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
decreased and
they could not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
the lesson well.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, in mixed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
. It is possible that the efficiency of the education may be less than single-sex.

In contrary, if we look at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
as a piece of the society then we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expect
the student
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
everything that needs for the social life.
It appears that a preposition is missing after 'According'.
According this
view, co-ed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
is better than other. When both gender study together, there is a chance for each of them to know the needs of the opposite gender and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
how to treat with them.
Therefore
, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
type
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
thier
future life.

Thus
, both of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
type
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
features.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, we cannot
absolutely
say which one is the best. The selection of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
for children
directly
related the parents point of view and
also
the society.
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IELTS essay Are single-sex schools more effective than co-ed schools?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
283 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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