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An increasing number of professionals ,such as doctors and teachers, are leaving their own poorer countries to work in developed countries. What problems does this cause? What can done to deal with this situation?

An increasing number of professionals, such as doctors and teachers, are leaving their own poorer countries to work in developed countries. What problems does this cause? What can done to deal with this situation? 082G
Despite knowing that their country is destitute, plethora of working professionals decide to work in wealthy countries. This essay will examine the problems and solutions to the current situation and provide a conclusion. On one hand, there are two main problems of choosing rich countries for their survival: one is their own land becomes more poor and there will decline in the economy and other problem is there will no working professionals and illiteracy will be surged. Firstly, the primary problem is there will be decline in economy which in turn leads to fall down of country's financial status. This makes the country more destitute than it is now. For instance, a nation needs doctors incase of emergency: if a country does not have proper medical facilities, the death rate soars up and there will be no future generation. That's why, it is essential for people to work in their own nation. Secondly, the another problem is literacy rate will never be increased. If all the educated people choose to work in the other countries then their own nation will not have professional people. For example, a teacher who was educated in India and left to Canada for teaching, will never contribute the skills to their nation which in turn rises the illiteracy rate. On the other hand, there are possible solutions for this problem: educating people about their country's situation and motivating them to work for their nation. The other solution would be government taking necessary steps to promote the employment opportunities so that the people will not get get an idea of choosing developed countries for their growth. To conclude, there are problems of choosing working in developed counties such as decline in economy and increase in illiteracy. However, this can eradicated by motivating and providing opportunities. Therefore, government must take immediate action to address this perilous situation.
Despite knowing that their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
is destitute, plethora of working professionals decide to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in wealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. This essay will examine the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
and solutions to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
situation and provide a conclusion. On one hand, there are two main
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
of choosing rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
for their survival: one is their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
land becomes more poor and there will decline in the economy and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
is there will no working professionals and illiteracy will
be surged
.
Firstly
, the primary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
is there will be decline in economy which in turn leads to fall down of country's financial status. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
more destitute than it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
.
For instance
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
needs doctors
Did you mean "in case of"?
incase of
emergency: if a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
does not have proper medical facilities, the death rate soars up and there will be no future generation. That's why, it is essential for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
.
Secondly
, the another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
is literacy rate will never
be increased
. If all the educated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
choose to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
then their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
will not have professional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
For example
, a teacher who
was educated
in India and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
to Canada for teaching, will never contribute the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
which in turn rises the illiteracy rate. On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, there are possible solutions for this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
: educating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
about their country's situation and motivating them to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
solution would be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
taking necessary steps to promote the employment opportunities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
an
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of choosing developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
for their growth.
To conclude
, there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
of choosing working in developed counties such as decline in economy and increase in illiteracy.
However
, this can eradicated by motivating and providing opportunities.
Therefore
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
take immediate action to address this perilous situation.
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IELTS essay An increasing number of professionals, such as doctors and teachers, are leaving their own poorer countries to work in developed countries. What problems does this cause? What can done to deal with this situation?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
310 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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