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Advertising influence people to buy things. What are the problems caused by that? What solutions can be given? v.1

Advertising influence people to buy things. What are the problems caused by that? What solutions can be given? v. 1
It is argued by some people that the main objective of ads is to persuade people to buy products. Creating artificial needs and spreading deceptive information are two prime demerits of advertisements and taxation on it and increasing awareness of people can be solutions to reduce its negative consequences. First and foremost, advertising makes artificial demand. To explain further, it destroys the utility of certain products before their normal life span as it manipulates to replace the old products with the latest and improved ones. As a ramification, society is becoming a throwaway society. For example, according to a recent survey of a lifestyle magazine, 70%of people of the USA buy new cars in spite of the fact that their old cars are still useable. Another drawback of ads is misleading and exaggerated messages. Some products are shown with unrealistic results, action stunts, and glamour. Children can not distinguish between real and fancy facts, and they pester their parent to buy unhealthy foods seen on media which leads to obesity and other health problems. The most practical solution can be to impose taxes on advertising. To be more precise, there should be a sliding scale of taxation rather than a flat rate as it might squeeze out non-profit advertisers. Higher tariff for who want to advertise unhealthily and environmentally destructive consumption such as cars and fast food, and lower rates for socially beneficial subjects like charities, awareness-raising campaign. For instance, comparing the same rule on cigarettes and alcohol, a human rights organization claims that it ought to be a realistic solution. Furthermore, awareness programs can be promoted to make people realize that hard-earned money should not be wasted buying unnecessary products, and parents should motivate children to learn critical thinking skills. In conclusion, although advertising tempts to buy things people do not need and display misleading information, these can be reduced by charging taxes on advertising accordingly and making people aware of its adverse outcomes.
It
is argued
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that the main objective of ads is to persuade
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
. Creating artificial needs and spreading deceptive information are two prime demerits of advertisements and taxation on it and increasing awareness of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can be solutions to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
its
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
consequences.

First
and foremost, advertising
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
artificial demand. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
further
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroys
the utility of certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
their normal life span as it manipulates to replace the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
with the latest and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
ones. As a ramification, society is becoming a throwaway society.
For example
, according to a recent survey of a lifestyle magazine, 70%of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of the USA
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
new cars
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
in spite of
the fact that their
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
cars are
still
useable. Another drawback of ads is misleading and exaggerated messages.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
are shown
with unrealistic results, action stunts, and glamour. Children can not distinguish between real and fancy facts, and they pester their parent to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
unhealthy foods
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
on media which leads to obesity and other health problems.

The most practical solution can be to impose taxes on advertising. To be more precise, there should be a sliding scale of taxation
rather
than a flat rate as it might squeeze out non-profit advertisers. Higher tariff for who want to advertise
unhealthily
and
environmentally
destructive consumption such as cars and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
food, and lower rates for
socially
beneficial subjects like charities, awareness-raising campaign.
For instance
, comparing the same
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rule
on cigarettes and alcohol, a human rights organization claims that it ought to be a realistic solution.
Furthermore
, awareness programs can
be promoted
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
realize that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
-earned money should not
be wasted
buying unnecessary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
, and parents should motivate children to learn critical thinking
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.

In conclusion
, although advertising tempts to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
things
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not need and display misleading information, these can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
by charging taxes on advertising
accordingly
and making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
aware of its adverse outcomes.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
16Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his own language, that goes to his heart.
Nelson Mandela

IELTS essay Advertising influence people to buy things. What are the problems caused by that? What solutions can be given? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
325 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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