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Advertising don't get attention.

Advertising don't get attention. wB5Ad
Now, advertising is common corporate strategy. A number of companies use advertising when they sell goods and services. Then, they use Instagram, Twitter, YouTube, Tick Tok and Television. So, I think their target is young people. Actually. I saw a lot of advertising in a day. However, advertising become good for nothing and lots of people no longer pay attention to it. The reason is that modern people aren’t interest in it. In a day, we saw a number of advertising and we don’t feel special. Moreover, a number of advertising always annoys us. Actually, when I used YouTube and Instagram and advertising suddenly played, I felt irritated. The reason is that what I wanted to see was forcibly stopped. In addition, a number of people ignore them because there are too many and not reliable. A number of people are deceived by buying goods which were introduced by advertisements. So, Modern people cannot trust it. What is more, the same advertisement plays many times and advertisements which we are not interest in. When I watch the YouTube, the advertisements which I am not interest in it. As a result, it is not surprising that modern people don’t like advertisements and care about it. In conclusion, advertisements can not be successful at persuading in persuading people to buy goods and services. Of course, some people are influenced by advertisements. Companies ought to make appropriate advertisements. If they make appropriate advertisements, we can trust them and a number of people buy goods and services.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
, advertising is common corporate strategy. A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
advertising when they sell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
goods
and services. Then, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
Instagram, Twitter, YouTube, Tick
Possible spelling mistake found.
Tok
and Television.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
their target is young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Actually. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
advertising in a day.

However
, advertising become
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
for nothing and lots of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
no longer pay attention to it. The reason is that modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
aren’t interest in it. In a day, we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
advertising and
we don’t feel special.
Moreover
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of advertising always annoys us. Actually, when I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
YouTube and Instagram and advertising
suddenly
played, I felt irritated. The reason is that what I wanted to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
was
forcibly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stopped
.
In addition
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignore
them
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there are too
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
and not
Possible agreement error. Did you mean "reliables"?
reliable
. A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are deceived
by buying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
goods
which
were introduced
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, Modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
cannot trust it.
What is more
, the same
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advertisement
plays
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
times and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
which we are not interest in. When I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
the YouTube, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
which I am not interest in it.
As a result
, it is not surprising that modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
don’t like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
and care about it.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
can not be successful at persuading in persuading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
goods
and services.
Of course
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are influenced
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Companies
ought to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
appropriate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
. If they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
appropriate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
, we can trust them and a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
goods
and services.
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IELTS essay Advertising don't get attention.

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
253 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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