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advertisements are becoming more and more common. It is positive or negative influences?

advertisements are becoming more and more common. It is positive or negative influences? 2be1j
Advertising is gaining more popularity in the marketing services and products. While Advertisement is considered to be advantageous, There have numerous positive influences. It is unquestionable that advertisement brings many benefits not only for individuals but also for businesses. Thanks to the posters or logos or commercial channels, A large number of people can know more information about products and services. They also can be kept informed about newly launched products, making them more shopping choices. Putting it an another way, Advertisment is a priority strategy for corporations. By using marketing and advertising, The message of products can reach to potential customers, therefore they can sell more their products. In additionally, Advertisement is a main industry of nations, it's likely to generate a diversity of employment opportunities. In other words, Advertisements provide occupation for artists and copywriter in designing logos, ideals, and posters for advertising. However, Many forms of advertisement have caused negative influences for consumers. A large number of items that do not ensure about the quality are advertised in almost kinds of public media, Therefore customers could experience the feeling of confusion, Making more trouble selecting in their taste. An another disadvantage is that Organizations have to a huge amount of money on advertising, As a result, the cost of items would increase sharply, Consumer have to pay more money to own them. Finally, Advertisement makes people buy products that they do not really need. Apple corporation is a typical example. By using advertising and marketing campaigns, they stimulate people buy their products and younger people are willing pay a massive money to own the lasted iPhone although their old phone still functions well. In conclusions, Based on the above the mentioned explanation, individuals may gain both benefits and drawback through the growing of advertising
Advertising is gaining more popularity in the marketing services and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
. While
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Advertisement
is considered
to be advantageous, There have numerous
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
influences.

It is unquestionable that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
brings
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
for individuals
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
for businesses. Thanks to the posters or logos or commercial channels,
Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use "many" or "numerous"
A large number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can know more information about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
and services. They
also
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
informed about
newly
launched
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
, making them more shopping choices. Putting it
One of these determiners is redundant in this context. Choose only one: "a way" or "another way".
an another way
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Advertisment
is a priority strategy for corporations. By using marketing and advertising, The message of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
can reach to potential customers,
therefore
they can sell more their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
. In
additionally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Advertisement
is a main industry of nations, it's likely to generate a diversity of employment opportunities.
In other words
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Advertisements
provide occupation for artists and copywriter in designing logos, ideals, and posters for advertising.

However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
forms of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
have caused
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
influences for consumers.
Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use "many" or "numerous"
A large number of
items that do not ensure about the quality
are advertised
in almost kinds of public media,
Therefore
customers could experience the feeling of confusion, Making more trouble selecting in their taste.
One of these determiners is redundant in this context. Choose only one: "a disadvantage" or "another disadvantage".
An another disadvantage
is that Organizations
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
a huge amount of money on advertising,
As a result
, the cost of items would increase
sharply
, Consumer
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
pay more money to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
them.
Finally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Advertisement
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
that they do not
really
need. Apple corporation is a typical example. By using advertising and marketing campaigns, they stimulate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
and younger
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are willing pay a massive money to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
the lasted iPhone although their
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
phone
still
functions well.

In conclusions, Based on the above the mentioned explanation, individuals may gain both benefits and drawback through the growing of advertising
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IELTS essay advertisements are becoming more and more common. It is positive or negative influences?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
296 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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