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advantages of advertisement

advantages of advertisement yLA7g
While on the one hand, advertising is regarded as the life-blood of modern business; on the other hand, some scholars are of the view that money spent on advertising is a waste. Those who hold this opinion are, as a matter of fact, the critics of advertising and they hint at its evils. Advertisement is a sort of day-dreaming for the people. These days, it is taking people away from reality and into the realm of artificiality. Through its medium people get information about new products, which only a very few products are of any use for them - the brilliance of new products really gets on their nerves, and consequently, people buy it without any hesitation. Also, it's not rare to believe in advertising, buy the product and on its use, feel cheated. A lot of organisations spent a large amount on advertising. It increased the cost of the products, and to meet this expenditure, price of the product is raised, which leads to unworthy product in term of price. It is really common to see many feedback of goods gone wrong all over social media
While on the one hand, advertising
is regarded
as the life-blood of modern business;
on the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
scholars are of the view that money spent on advertising is a waste. Those who hold this opinion are, as a matter of fact, the critics of
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
advertising and
they hint at its evils. Advertisement is a sort of day-dreaming for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. These days, it is taking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
away from reality and into the realm of artificiality. Through its medium
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
information about new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
are of any
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
for them
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
-
the brilliance of new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
really
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
on their nerves, and
consequently
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
it without any hesitation.
Also
, it's not rare to believe in advertising,
Consider using third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: "buys".
buy
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
and on its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
, feel cheated.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
A lot of
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisations' is British English.
organisations
spent a large amount on advertising. It increased the cost of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
, and to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
this expenditure, price of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
is raised
, which leads to unworthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
in term of price. It is
really
common to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
Possible agreement error. The noun feedback seems to be uncountable; consider using: "much feedback", "a good deal of feedback".
many feedback
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
gone
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
all over social
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
media
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IELTS essay advantages of advertisement

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
186 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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