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Advantages and disadvantages of studentsworking while studying

Advantages and disadvantages of studentsworking while studying GMALx
Nowadays, many students are choosing to work part-time while pursuing their education. It is true that working while studying provides an overview of industry culture and makes them responsible, it can be quite taxing for scholars. The essay will examine these merits and demerits in detail. To begin with, being employed during the studying stage gives an exposure to the undergraduates into the working world. Consequently, it helps them to prepare themselves for what lies ahead in their future and also aids them in choosing their future career path. For example, if a pupil is working as a salesperson, it might inculcate in them an aptitude to pursue their higher studies in Sales and Marketing course. Thus, the opportunity to work helps them for their career. Secondly, students become responsible and learn about money handling if they start to earn at a young age. Moreover, they will understand the value of hard-earned income as it is their fruit of labour. For instance, students won't splurge their savings on expensive video games or other vices. They will use it to support their education, buy books or stationaries. Overall, having an income during studies is advantageous. Conversely, there are a few cons to being employed during schooling. First off, pupils might find it stressful and will struggle to manage their time for learning. They will lose their concentration in academia and might fall back on their grades. As part-time jobs consume their after school time they won't be able to complete their homework or prepare for exams well. Second off, they might miss out on spending quality time with family and friends. Due to their job, commitments they will miss many important, fun aspects of student life such as birthday occasions, school trips, parties etc. To conclude, although it is beneficial for youngsters to work during their education as it makes them responsible and gives them a taste of the working world. The drawback is they might find it stressful and also lose out on good times with family and pals.
Nowadays,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are choosing to work part-time while pursuing their education. It is true that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
while studying provides an overview of industry culture and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
them responsible, it can be quite taxing for scholars. The essay will examine these merits and demerits in detail.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
being employed
during the studying stage gives an exposure to the undergraduates into the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
world.
Consequently
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them to prepare themselves for what lies ahead in their future and
also
aids them in choosing their future career path.
For example
, if a pupil is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
as a salesperson, it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
inculcate in them an aptitude to pursue their higher studies in Sales and Marketing course.
Thus
, the opportunity to work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them for their career.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
become responsible and learn about money handling if they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to earn at a young age.
Moreover
, they will understand the value of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
-earned income as it is their fruit of
Possible spelling mistake. 'labour' is British English.
labour
.
For instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
won't splurge their savings on expensive video games or other vices. They will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
it to support their education,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
books or
Possible spelling mistake found.
stationaries
.
Overall
, having an income during studies is advantageous.

Conversely
, there are a few cons to
being employed
during schooling.
First
off, pupils
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
find it stressful and will struggle to manage their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for learning. They will lose their concentration in academia and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
fall back on their grades. As part-time jobs consume their after school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
they won't be able to complete their homework or prepare for exams well. Second off, they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
miss out on spending quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with family and friends. Due to their job, commitments they will miss
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
, fun aspects of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
life such as birthday occasions, school trips, parties etc.

To conclude
, although it is beneficial for youngsters to work during their education as it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
them responsible and gives them a taste of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
world. The drawback is they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
find it stressful and
also
lose out on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
with family and pals.
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IELTS essay Advantages and disadvantages of studentsworking while studying

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
339 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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