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Advantage and disadvantage of telling children that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough.

Advantage and disadvantage of telling children that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. Vr2KO
If a child learns anything at an early stage of their life they tend to grasp things faster. Making children learn this quality makes them focused and determined from the start of their journey. Another advantage is that it is a quality that they would carry with them for the rest of their lives and in fact, also motivate others around them. To cite an example, from learning of a bicycle, the parents make their kids understand that if they give up, they would not be able to ride like their friends which in return motivate them to learn quicker. Further more, it makes pupils accept their failures, and learn from the mistakes. If an individual keeps on trying a single task several times, they eventually learn the tricks and even get better at it. Also teaching a child to not give up, they would put it at all the situations they comeacrsoss, from playing a video game to their academics, learning a bicycle to driving a car. Apart from this, it a life mantra and a trick to success. In order to be a master at something, we keep on working on the same unless the desired results are achieved. On the other side, if an individual keeps on trying a given task several times and is unsuccessful at all the attempts, it would gradually make them negative and they could doubt themselves. This then becomes a serious issue and would lead to depression and suicide at worse cases. Another disadvantage is, the child may not accept his failures. The notion “I can do it”, may cause children not accept their mistakes, and may lead to more negative and serious issues with the time. For example, if a child is good in academics, but if someone else is better than them, then sometimes the person may take help of false methods to prove that he/she is better than the rest. There are both advantages and disadvantages to it. I believe just teaching them to not give up is not enough, along with that they must also be taught to differentiate between good and bad. This would help the child not give up by good means only. To sum up, teaching a child to try harder at every task has both merits and demerits; however, the positive points are far more.
“If” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
If
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learns
anything at an early stage of their life they tend to grasp things faster. Making children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
this quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
them focused and determined from the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
of their journey. Another advantage is that it is a quality that they would carry with them for the rest of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
and in fact,
also
motivate others around them. To cite an example, from learning of a bicycle, the parents
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
their kids understand that if they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
up, they would not be able to ride like their friends which in return motivate them to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
quicker.

Further
more, it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
pupils accept their failures, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
from the mistakes. If an individual
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keeps
on trying a single task several times, they
eventually
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
the tricks and even
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
better at it.
Also
teaching a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
to not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
up, they would put it at all the situations they
Possible spelling mistake found.
comeacrsoss
, from playing a video game to their academics, learning a bicycle to driving a car. Apart from this, it a life mantra and a trick to success. In order to be a master at something, we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
on working on the same unless the desired results
are achieved
.

On the other side, if an individual
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keeps
on trying a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
task several times and is unsuccessful at all the attempts, it would
gradually
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
them
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
negative and
they could doubt themselves. This then becomes a serious issue and would lead to depression and suicide at worse cases. Another disadvantage is, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
may not accept his failures. The notion “I can do it”, may cause children not accept their mistakes, and may lead to more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
and serious issues with the time.
For example
, if a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
in academics,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
if someone else is better than them, then
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
the person may take
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of false methods to prove that he/she is better than the rest.

There are both advantages and disadvantages to it. I believe
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
teaching them to not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
up is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
, along with that they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
also
be taught
to differentiate between
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
. This would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
up by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
means
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
.

To sum up, teaching a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
to try harder at every task has both merits and demerits;
however
, the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
points are far more.

IELTS essay Advantage and disadvantage of telling children that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
391 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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