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According to most doctors, adults need thirty minutes of physical activity at least five days a week to be healthy. However, most adults do not get this recommended amount of exercise. What can be done to help people get the exercise they need? Give examples to support your answer.

These days, most of the young people tend not to exercise regularly, and this has detrimental impacts on their health which can lead to serious helath issues such obesity and high blood pressure. I will explain some of the reasons behind this trend, and I will suggest ways to resolve the issue. The most significant reason that youth do not have enough physical activities is the lack of free time; in other words, many young persons work in full time jobs for more than 10 or12 hours a day, so they do not have enough time to go to gym. This is mainly the case in the developing socities. According to a study published in newspaprers in 2010, 80 % of the working force, whose age between 20 and 40, were seldom exercise as they had no time to do this. This why many governments in prosperous countries encourgae their citizens to do exercise by limiting working hours to less than 6 hours a day. Another reasons is the a great number of individuals do not the importance of doing exercise which can be mitigate by raising awareness campagin.
These days, most of the young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
tend not to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
regularly
, and this has detrimental impacts on their health which can lead to serious
Possible spelling mistake found.
helath
issues such obesity and high blood pressure. I will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
If the text is a generality, ‘of the’ is not necessary.
some of the
reasons behind this trend, and I will suggest ways to resolve the issue.

The most significant reason that youth do not have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
physical activities is the lack of free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
;
in other words
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
young persons work in full
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
jobs for more than 10 or12 hours a day,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they do not have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to go to gym. This is
mainly
the case in the developing
Possible spelling mistake found.
socities
. According to a study published in
Possible spelling mistake found.
newspaprers
in 2010, 80 % of the working force, whose age between 20 and 40, were seldom
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
as they had no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to do this. This why
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
in prosperous countries
Possible spelling mistake found.
encourgae
their citizens to do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
by limiting working hours to less than 6 hours a day.

Another reasons
You should probably use: “are”.
is
Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only “the” or “a” is left.
the a
great number of individuals do not the importance of doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
which can be
Consider using the past participle “mitigated”.
mitigate
by raising awareness
Possible spelling mistake found.
campagin
.
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IELTS essay According to most doctors, adults need thirty minutes of physical activity at least five days a week to be healthy. However, most adults do not get this recommended amount of exercise. What can be done to help people get the exercise they need? Give examples to support your answer.

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
189 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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