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A life change is good sometimes

A life change is good sometimes dkmA2
Many people think that living their lives without any change is the best thing to do, while others claim that everyone must face some changes in life, because people do better this way. Although I respect all opinions on the subject, In my view, at some point in life, a change means I new opportunity to keep our mind healthy and also to learn new skills. That is the reason why everybody nees tho do different things. I will start by saying that it is understandable that there are men and women that tend to go about their lives in a more predictable way. We are scared of the the different, and whenever we have to do something out of the ordinary, such as move houses, getting a new job, making an important decision, our brain suffers and forces us not to do anything. That is simply a human thing. In my case, I am always scared when I have to meet a new boss, because it is something new. On the other hand, there are those who believes that a good life is made of changes, and I believe they I right for two important reasons. Fist, getting though different choises and ways of living forces our brain not to fall in a routine, which is certainly good for our mental health. For example, if you have made an important choice in your life, for instance, moving to a foreign country, you brain will receive a lot of new information everyday. Second, a life change it is also an opportunity to learn new habilities. Only those who faces the hardship of change takes the advantages of learning new skills. For exemple, it takes a bit of courage to learn how to sing or how to master a new language. In conclusion, despite many people like their lives with no big changes, a healthy mind is only achieved by searching and acepting new things in life and facing every obstacles that comes with it.
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people
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think
that living their
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lives
without any
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change
is the best thing to do, while others claim that everyone
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must
face
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some
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changes
in
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life
,
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because
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
do better this way. Although I respect all opinions on the subject, In my view, at
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some
point in
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life
, a
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change
means I
Did you mean "knew" (past of 'to know')?
new
opportunity to
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keep
our mind healthy and
also
to learn
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new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.
That is
the reason why everybody
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nees
tho do
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different
things.

I will
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start
by saying that it is understandable that there are
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men
and women that tend to go about their
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lives
in a more predictable way. We
are scared
of
Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only "the" or "the" is left.
the the
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different
, and whenever we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
do something out of the ordinary, such as
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move
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houses
, getting a
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new
job, making an
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important
decision, our brain suffers and forces us not to do anything.
That is
simply
a human thing. In my case, I am always scared when I
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have to
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meet
a
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new
boss,
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because
it is something new.

On the other hand
, there are those who believes that a
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good
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life
is made
of
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changes
, and I believe they I right for two
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important
reasons. Fist, getting though
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different
Possible spelling mistake found.
choises
and ways of living forces our brain not to fall in a routine, which is
certainly
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good
for our mental health.
For example
, if you have made an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
choice in your
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life
,
for instance
, moving to a foreign country, you brain will receive
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a lot of
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new
information
'Everyday' is an adjective. Did you mean "every day"?
everyday
. Second, a
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life
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change
it is
also
an opportunity to learn
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new
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habilities
.
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Only
those who faces the hardship of
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change
takes the advantages of learning
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new
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skills
. For
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exemple
, it takes a bit of courage to learn how to sing or how to master a
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new
language.

In conclusion
, despite
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many
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people
like their
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lives
with no
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big
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changes
, a healthy mind is
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only
achieved by searching and
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acepting
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new
things in
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life
and facing every
The noun should be probably in the singular form: "obstacle"?
obstacles
that
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comes
with it.
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IELTS essay A life change is good sometimes

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
334 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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